


Wayfarer

by Gylfie109



Series: Lost In The Ebb And Flow Of The Tide [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Autistic Character, Fox Summons, Fuck Canon, Good!Orochimaru, I have no idea, I'm yeeting it out the window, In which I have no idea what I'm doing, Original Uzumaki character, Original akimichi character - Freeform, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Reincarnation, Self-Indulgent, Self-Insert, Spider Summons - Freeform, This fic has a mind of it's own, Uchiha Shisui Lives, Wanderlust, Why is there so many children?, but - Freeform, raven summons
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:28:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 21,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22121839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gylfie109/pseuds/Gylfie109
Summary: My brother convinced me to write this and then things got out of hand so now you guys can have it.Most fanfics I read had the main character want to change everything right off the bat. Maybe that's what would have happened, if my brother hadn't been reborn with me. Now I just want to see the world and make sure we survive.Alternative summary: two gremlins just want to explore the world, but keep getting pulled into The Plot TM by accident.
Relationships: Deidara (Naruto) & Original Character(s), Uchiha Shisui & Original Female Character(s), Uchiha Shisui & Original Male Character(s)
Series: Lost In The Ebb And Flow Of The Tide [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1713016
Comments: 58
Kudos: 294
Collections: Reincarnation and Transmigration





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> In this chapter there is a very brief mention of child abuse.my phone wouldn't let me tag it so this is a warning. It is only a few words, and isn't very graphic.

I guess just looking at us, you would think that we were just normal civie kids. We both have rather generic greyish black hair and onyx eyes. In a crowded place, you would easily look over two young children grasping at each others' clothes to avoid losing the other. 

That first look? It couldn't have been more wrong.

In another universe, perhaps you would have been correct. However, In another universe Uchiha Sasuke and Senju Tsunade would also be the last of their bloodlines. This is not that universe.

This is the universe where both Senju Tobirama and Uchiha Izuna had bastard children, and then those children had children, and then finally the two families merged and created us, Nakamura Suzuki and Hisoka.

Nakamura Suzuki and Hisoka, who in another life were named Madison and Damien Grant. Another life where the only dangerous thing we did was stay up too late watching Naruto on a school night. Now, we live in a world where our blood could get us killed, and we definitely do not want to die a second time.

We had no idea where we were when we were reborn, we were just glad to still have each other. I was one when I remembered my last life, and then my new mother was pregnant with a second child. I was so worried that my brother wouldn't be with me this time around, and when I got to hold my new brother for the first time….. I got the strange feeling that it wasn't the first time we met. Hisoka's little fingers wrapped around my hand and all I could think was _'I finally found you, little brother.'_

It wasn't until I turned five and Hisoka was four that we found out just who we were. Papa had come home injured and ushered us into a space under the floorboards. Mama was crying and apologizing, saying that it was her fault that we were found. Mama's eyes turned red when a masked someone came in through our window, and Papa fell to the ground, another masked person behind him.

Papa had told us that if anything like this were to happen, we were to stay absolutely silent and to find the trapdoor that would lead us to a place away from our home in the mountains, and to run until we couldn't anymore. 

I didn't realize this at the time, but my vision was much sharper than it should have been in the dark. 

I had slowly crawled through the cobwebs and opened the dusty trapdoor in the corner. The hole under only big enough for one small child to go in at a time. I made Hisoka go in first, and once I couldn't see his toes I slipped into the darkness after him and closed the door above us. It felt like we had been in the dark for days, it was probably only hours, when we finally reached the end of the tunnel. I had to squirm between the wall and my brother to help push the door open. We had to blink dirt out of our eyes as the tunnel opened up to a small hollow under the tangled roots of a tree.

Hisoka was the first one out, and just like his first life as Damien, he couldn't handle the stress very well. That could be explained because we are children, but the plants reacting to his emotions? That couldn't be explained by anything we experienced in any of our lives.

I reached out to hug him to my chest just like back in our first life whenever it got too tough for him, but he screamed and lashed at my face with his tiny hand. I reacted without thinking and caught his hand. I stared at him in shock when I caught sight of my reflection in his eyes. My previously onyx coloured eyes were now stained blood red, with three tomoe spinning innocently in my irises. The sight coupled with the plants reactions jogged a memory buried under all the infantile amnesia of a young boy named Sasuke who grew up to kill his big brother. And that rebooted my memories of the show we had watched so much of as teenagers in our previous life.

Everything came together in my mind. The way Mama always kept her hair in a bun, the way Papa always covered his hair in berry juice when he left for days on end, the reason we have been taught since we could stand on how to fight and how to survive, the strange blank masked people, the way Mama and Papa held themselves, the plants moving on their own, Mama's red eyes, _my_ red eyes.

" _Damien, I don't want to freak you out anymore, but I think I know where we are now."_ I whispered in English. I hadn't called him Damien since we died.

" _Where-"_ Understanding spread across his face " _Oh."_

" _Yeah, oh."_ I concentrated really hard and reached inside, searching for the energy I can now recognize as chakra. Once I got a firm grip on my chakra, I pulled it away from my eyes and closer to my stomach. I opened my eyes and was relieved to see at the same amount as normal people. I stretched a hand out towards my brother and drew him close. We only stayed there for another minute before I forced myself up and grabbed his hand.

By the position of the sun, it was probably only about 9 am, and the sun rises in the east so I probably started dragging us north west of where we emerged from the tunnel.

We were only in our night clothes when we were shoved under the floorboards, so our feet were bare. By the time Hisoka had collapsed, his feet were bloody and I had to carry him. By the time I finally stopped running, the sun had moved to just a little past what would be noon. My feet were bloody and bruised, but I couldn't stop just yet. We still needed water at least, even if we couldn't find food.

I was lucky that Papa taught us how to find water and which plants are edible. I closed my eyes and listened. When I opened them, I tore off towards the stream that I could hear nearby, grabbing clumps of moss as I ran. I soaked the moss in the water and looked around. I spotted a familiar white flowered plant.

Watercress!

I grabbed enough of the leaves to get us through the day and rinsed the leaves in the stream.

Taking the water and leaves that I'd managed to scavenge, I made my way back to Hisoka. I had to practically shove the leaves down his throat because he refused to try something new.

It's stupid little things like that which would get us killed. We should know, it's one of the contributing factors to both of our deaths. I was stupid enough to believe that I would be strong enough to defend both of us against predators, and let him refuse to eat the precious few things that we found while lost in the forest during that damned trip. I wasn't, and a bear decided that we would be a great feast for her cubs. You know what happened next.

Our only goal in this world at the time was to survive. Survive at any cost except at the expense of the other.

So when I pointed out the many similarities between my brother and Uchiha Kagami, between me and Senju Tobirama , and both of our facial features to Uchiha Izuna and Senju Hashirama, we mutually decided to change our appearance.

I was into makeup design in my past life, so faking gaunt cheeks and less narrow eyes was pretty easy. As long as no one forced us to wash our faces we would be safe.

I managed to find an old kunai left in the dirt, and took the rusty edge to Hisoka's curls. Since he didn't have the Sharingan like I did, he didn't need to keep his hair long enough to cover his eyes. I decided to leave my hair mostly the same, but cut it short enough to hang just below my shoulders, leaving a curtain of hair to fall into my face if I ever needed to use my eyes without being seen.

After a few days of shoving leaves down Hisoka's throat, pathetic attempts at cooking some rabbit, and complaints, we finally reached a small town in the middle of nowhere. 

Hisoka can't lie for shit, but I spent nine years of my old life lying to protect my family from the truth about Mom's husband, and that I was fine. It wasn't hard for me to pretend that we were raised on the streets, and that we hadn't eaten in a few days. It got us a four hundred yen, an apple, some strawberries, and a single onigiri. 

It was enough to survive on for maybe two days, if I spaced it out enough, but that would have been for a adult who knows how to save money. Not for two young _growing_ children who couldn't save money for shit in either life.

So I decided that the next course of action was to search for menial tasks that others would pay us for. Washing windows, shoveling hay, feeding animals, anything I could get my grubby hands on.

That's how we met Nakamura Arata. He was one of the elders of the tiny village. He was one of my regular customers, often having me bring him groceries, or clean his windows, or help tend the garden. He always gave me extra food to take home after he found out about Hisoka. He never had me work longer than an hour without a break, and told me to come to him if I ever needed anything. I let others set the price because I knew that some wouldn't accept paid help if I set prices I thought were reasonable, but Arata-san always paid me a full purse of yen even if the only thing I did was help him sort his bookshelf.

Eventually, I decided that he was safe enough for me to bring Hisoka around. He was delighted.

"This is the little Hisoka that I've heard so much about? It's wonderful to finally meet you, young man." Arata-san usher the both of us in and gave us some tea.

It took Hisoka some time to adjust to this new person in his life, but once he warned up to Arata-san, he couldn't stop talking about all the things that he wanted to build, and the things he built out of the few twigs he could find. We learned that Arata-san used to be a carpenter, and the two quickly bonded over their love of building.

A few months later, and Hisoka slipped up, accidentally calling Arata-san Chichi. The man had scooped Hisoka up into his arms and cried. After that, neither of us ever referred to him as Arata-san and instead called him Chichi. Chichi had us moved in with him, and we took his last name on. For four and a half years, we lived happily in our little cottage.

But it wasn't to last. Chichi eventually grew I'll, his old age finally catching up with him. Chichi lived for another month before we sat beside him on his deathbed, listening to his last words. I didn't cry, not right away, not while he was still talking to us. Hisoka had tucked himself under Chichi's arm and cried softly as Chichi told us his last words.

"I love you two so much, as if you truly were my own flesh and blood. I thought I would never have children after my wife died, and I had given up hope long before you both came into my life. I am so proud of the both of you. You gave me the chance to be a father, and the privilege of having two gifted children to pass my knowledge on to. I know you will be great, just as I know you will not stay after I go. You both have the need to discover everything around you, and I can tell that you have been running from your past. You were never meant to stay in one place, and certainly not such a dreary place as this. I want you to take everything you can from our home, and never turn back. Go and be great, just as you were always meant to." With that, Chichi closed his eyes and breathed his last, and Hisoka awakened his Sharingan, a single tomoe spinning in each eye.

We sat and cried together for hours, before we had him taken away to be prepared for burial. He would be buried next to his wife, and I know for a fact that I will always remember Chichi, and that Hisoka and I will both request to be buried right beside him when it comes time for us to leave this world as well.

We hurriedly gathered up everything we could carry, Hisoka making large wooden chests for us to carry on our backs. I took the brunt of the weight, all food supplies and equipment going to me and clothing and trinkets from home to Hisoka. We carried a first aid kit each, as well as rope to hang supplies and sleeping bags, and all the yen that Chichi had saved up for us, enough to last us at least a year.

I managed to save up enough to buy a basic kunai set for myself so we could actually properly kill and skin any animals we trapped.

We traveled for approximately 4 months when we decided to stop by the river and take a bath. That would have been fine, had a body not floated past us. I was the only one to react, and dragged the man to shore. It was hard, given that I am only 9 and my brother just turned 9 a few days ago, to drag him out of the water but we managed.

I was training to be a lifeguard in my past life and had all my first aid qualifications, so I was quick to check his pulse and breathing. When I found nothing, I immediately started CPR. I got through 3 cycles before water burbled at his mouth. I turned his head and cleared out the mess before I started my cycles again. I got through half of that cycle before he sputtered and started coughing. Only then did I actually notice his bleeding, _empty_ eye sockets and his hitai-ate, and his high collared shirt.

We just saved Uchiha _fucking_ Shisui _._ **Shit.**


	2. Chapter 2

The very first thing he did was question us.

"Where am I?" He croaked out.

"I don't know, by a river? We were trying to have a bath when you floated by. I don't know where we are or where we're going."

"Shit, you're kids?How old are you? Where are your parents."

"Yeah. I'm almost 10." "And I just turned 9!" Hisoka chimed in."Mama and Papa died when we were 5 and 4, and Chichi died a few months ago."I lowered my voice. Shisui-san had a somber look on his face.

"I'm sorry for your loss."

"It's okay, it wasn't for awhile, but at least we had each other. By the way, what's your name?" I asked.

"It's Shisui. And what are your names?" He asked.

"I'm Suzuki, it's nice ta meet ya." I patted his hand.

"Hisoka." He placed his hand on top of mine.

We sat there for a few awkward moments with our hands stacked on top of each others before I stood up.

"We need to find you a medic, Shisui-san. Can you stand?Hisoka, go check your traps." I let him run off before I helped Shisui-san sit up.

"I think so. Ugh." He reached out blindly until I guided his hand to my shoulder and let him push himself up.

I ignored his weight and immediately grabbed his hand once he steadied himself.

"How did you save me? Your too young to be a medic."

"That's easy. I broke your ribs and gave a kiss of life."

"EXCUSE ME WHAT."

"In other terms I broke your ribs to manually move your heart and lungs, and pushed air from my lungs into yours to simulate breathing until you could do it yourself. It's simple, and Mama taught me how to do it." I shrugged.

"I knew that, I was asking how the heck a tiny child was strong enough to break ribs."

"Oh that! Hisoka and I both helped Chichi with his projects, and Papa taught us to fight. Mama gave us basic strength exercises that suited the natural strength we got from Mama's family."

We started walking towards our campsite, when Hisoka came back with two dead rabbits dangling from his hand by their hind legs, blood staining the fur from their slit throats.

"I checked the traps, we're going to eat like kings today!" He held the poor creatures up to my face.

"Ew, that's gross and unsanitary. I don't want it's blood on me, I have no idea what things might be in its blood. Who knows, maybe you'll get a flesh eating disease from touching them." I joked. Hisoka pulled a face and put them in the bag at his hip.

"What are two kids your age doing out all alone in the forest anyways?" Shisui-san asked from where he leaned against one of the trees.

"Oh, we're wandering. Could never stay in one place too long. We plan to see the entire elemental nations eventually. We would be halfway to Suna if somebody didn't get us lost." Hisoka chirped, and I kicked the back of his knee.

"Shut up, we wouldn't be lost if you didn't use our map for the fucking fire, dipshit. Besides, I never said I wanted to visit Suna yet. I would much rather head to Yuugakure, I heard there's a murder cult there." I added.

"You and your cults! You're weird, why do you want to get on everyone's kill list?"

"Not everyone, just the cults. Besides, the last cult I pissed off ended up dying right after we left, and I got a sick looking knife outta it!" That was a few weird days. I sniffed out a cult that worshipped some snake-bird thing in the trees, and I decided to throw all their views in their faces by bringing the head of their so-called god to them. I wouldn't have done it normally, but the fact that they claimed a normal python in a tree was a god irked me and I have no idea why. Literally right after I left, the few cultists all dropped dead and I found a jagged obsidian knife with a snakeskin handle. I of course kept it

"Wait, you're telling me you actually actively seek out these cults….. just to piss them off? You're 9! You should be at school." Shisui-san shook his head.

"Schools boring and too easy. We tried about 2 and a half months ago, but we already knew everything so we left."Half-truth, but he doesn't have to know that. I grabbed what little still needed grabbing and went back to holding Shisui-san's hand. 

We started heading south west according to the sun and travelled at a steady pace. Surprisingly, no one attacked us and Shisui-san didn't drop dead from overexertion. That was an actual possibility, considering he's walking around with broken ribs and somehow miraculously survived Aburame Torune poisoning him. Also, he's blind as all shit and hasn't fully adjusted yet.

I helped him sit down and handed him one of our canteens before I helped set up our little campsite. I hauled our extra food up into a tree as Hisoka started skinning the rabbits. After, I helped build a fire and stuck both rabbits on a spit and roasted them. 

When I turned back to Shisui-san, he was dressing his wounds. Somehow. I have no idea where he got the gauze.

I sat down next to him. "Shisui-san, are you part of a clan?" He stiffened beside me for a second, but sighed.

"Yeah, I guess that was pretty obvious."

"It was. You might want to get rid of that shirt if you want to go unnoticed. You look like us so we could easily pretend to be siblings. The only difference is we look like someone dumped chalk in our hair." He went silent for a second.

"Suzuki. Did either of your parents have red eyes with tomoe in them?" Shisui-san asked in a lowered voice.

"Hmm…..well Papa had just red eyes, and Mama's eyes were normally black….. oh, when the masked men killed Papa, Mama's eyes went red. We were under the floor so I couldn't see very well. Hisoka and I got the special red eyes too. Mama said that we shouldn't show them to anyone or they'll take them." I pressed some of the rabbit into Shisui-san's hands before shoving a chunk into my mouth.

"And how many tomoe do you have?"

"Hisoka has one, but I have three." I said through a mouthful of meat. Shisui-san's breath hitched.

"And your dad?"

"Papa was part of another clan… .Senji, maybe? I can't remember, we go by Nakamura anyways." He dropped the last of his rabbit, but I caught it before it hit the ground.

"Hey! Be careful! Don't waste our food!" I scolded the shocked teen. I ate the bit and left him to stew in his shock. I'm supposed to be a child, he can come to me once he's decided what to do with that information.

Hisoka was chipping away at his little project, a crude figurine of Steve from Minecraft, so I left him alone and set up my sleeping area. After that, I fished out the ninja wire I filched from post battleground corpses and laid a tripwire around the perimeter of our campsite, tying cans to the wire for an alarm. It's far enough back that we'll hear it, but no one will see us right away unless their looking for us.

The sun is already setting, so I made it back to camp and threw dirt on our fire. I stamped out the coals and sat on my sleeping bag.

"Okay, plan for tonight. What is it?" I asked. Hisoka looked at me from his seat on a log.

"I don't know. I think it's my turn first? We usually do 4 shifts, but with Shisui-san…” Hisoka drifted off, glancing at the teen with uncertainty. Shisui-san smiled at us, seemingly getting over his shock instantly. I may just be horrible at reading people though.

“You don’t have to worry about me, kiddos. I can go on guard for the entire night.” I shook my head.

“No way, you’re hurt. We’ll stick to the normal plan, but if you really want to help you can take the last shift.” Shisui-sans’s expression became strained, probably because he’s taking orders from someone half his age. Or maybe it’s because he doesn’t approve? Oh well.

I settled down and closed my eyes as Hisoka got up and went to find a perch for his shift.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluff from Shisui's POV.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song sung in this chapter is the English cover of 'Blue Bird' by LeeandLie. Check it out on YouTube if you want.
> 
> Sorry it's short, I'm drowning in homework currently. I also haven't written blind perspectives before and I wanted to get it right.

These kids…. Now it makes sense as to why they can act like adults one second and then their age the next.

When Suzuki-chan started leading me by my hand, I couldn't help but think 'Oh no, I have to protect them.' I mean, I'm a total stranger. I may be injured but I'm still a ninja and this little girl is holding my hand.

I honestly should have gone back to Konoha, but I couldn't just leave these two children out in the wild all alone. It didn't help that Suzuki-chan and Hisoka-chan remind me of Itachi-kun and Sasuke-chan. Protective older sibling and younger sibling who adores the other.

And...Danzo. If I were to return, who knows what the old war hawk would do. What would the Sandaime- 

"You said if you could fly, " I was shaken out of my thoughts by little Suzuki-chan singing a song I've never heard of. "You would fly far, far into the sky so all you’d ever know is that blue, is that blue sky up above." 

I looked for her chakra, and found her up in a tree… That is a lot of chakra for a tiny child.

"That's a cute song, Suchan. Where did you learn it?" I called up to her, only for her to shriek and her chakra to completely disappear.

"WHEN DID YOU WAKE UP?!" Came the high pitched squeak.

I couldn't help it.

"Pfft-ow." I groaned. Laughter hurts, got it. Don't do it again. 

There was a thud and her chakra reappeared, rushing towards me.

"Don't do things that'll hurt you, idiot! Be more careful." A tiny hand hit the back of my head.

"Your bedside manners are horrible." I poked at her, earning an indignant squawk.

"I'm not a doctor, I don't need bedside manners! And what's with the name?"

"I like you, kid. You give nicknames to people you like." I grinned at where I hope is her face.

She went quiet, and for a second I thought I had said something wrong, before she breathed out a quiet 'oh'. She sounded astonished, like she couldn't believe she had heard me correctly. 

My heart broke for the poor kid, and I beckoned her closer. I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and hugged her.

"I don't know you or your brother very much, but already you two are some of the best people I've ever met. Not a lot of people would go out of their way to help a random stranger."

It was silent, but not like before. This time I knew I said the right thing. Suchan curled up against my side and we sat like that for a few minutes before she spoke up.

"...Can I call you Shicchan? Would that be okay?" Her voice was just above a whisper. I squeezed her closer.

"Yeah, it's okay kiddo."

"Do you have a nickname for Hisoka too?"

"I think so, but I'll tell you in the morning. Go to sleep, Suchan." I could feel her smile into my arm.

"Okay."


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lazy drawing of Madison and Suzuki. Just felt like I should share it. 
> 
> I have a tumblr now, it's nakamurasuzuki. You can get updates there, as well as send asks and see any art I do for this. You may even get teaser images for new chapters~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All effort went into drawing that brown eye and making sure that the colors stayed in the lines.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Suzuki is the embodiment of a very specific Goose.

We've been traveling for two days, and finally we've reached a large village in the Land of Rivers. 

On our way here, Shicchan's hitai-ate disappeared and I turned his shirt into bandages to cover his eye sockets. Hicchan and I might've been used to seeing them, but the same cannot be said for others.

I led Shicchan by the hand as we searched for a clinic or hospital.

I know that Shicchan could just use sensing to avoid running into people, but unless he can suddenly sense natural energy he's stuck holding my hand or risk running into a pole.

Sadly, as it turns out, you have to pay a fortune for medical help unless you're a ninja. Also sadly, we cannot say that Shicchan is a ninja without blowing his cover and it's very possible for word to reach Danzo, and I don't want ROOT up our asses.

So it's time for Plan B:Find Tsunade.

Luckily, rumors say that she's in town. How did I find this out? I'm a child, nobody suspects children to be listening to their conversations. It was rather easy to eavesdrop on some men who were practically drooling over the thought of the Senju princess. Which, ew, that's my cousin and she's way out of your league.

"Are you sure about this, Suchan? She moves rather quickly for a woman of her age." Shicchan asked in a low voice.

"Never insult a woman like that, Shicchan. If she'd heard you, you'd be dead. And, yeah! I'm sure, the men were talking like she just arrived so we're in luck!" Shicchan whined behind me as I dragged him off.

"To do list: Find Tsunade-hi-" A body crashed through the window of the bar just in front of us, "Found her. Revised to do list: find a way in to the bar. Steal sake. Steal Tsunade-hime's hotel keys. Annoy Tsunade-hime. Get Shicchan healed. Any questions?"

"How will annoying Tsunade-hime get her to heal Shicchan?" Hicchan tugged on my sleeve nervously.

"She won't, her apprentice will though! Tsunade-hime doesn't heal anybody anymore, Hicchan." I marched right up to the door, suppressing my chakra as I did so. I've discovered that most people don't look for something they can't sense if they're distracted.

I walked in without being stopped and immediately went into action, Shicchan and Hicchan right behind me.

I split off and used my height to my advantage, crawling under the tables and around people's legs.I have no idea what Hicchan and Shicchan were doing, but I soon found who I was looking for. Shizune and a tiny baby Tonton. 

It was rather easy to swipe the keys from Shizune, as she was paying attention to Tsunade-hime and her drinking problem.

It was also easy to swipe a few bottles of sake everytime Tsunade-hime turned her back only to have to order a new bottle because it disappeared again.

Apparently Tsunade-hime actually won her game because she stood up abruptly and started towards the door.

"Shizune, we're leaving. Something bad is going to happen."

Not necessarily bad, but it definitely won't be very fun. For you,I mean. I'm going to have so much fun.

I slunk after the two women, being careful to be as quiet as possible.

"Lady Tsunade? Our keys are gone."

"What?" I decided now was as good a time as any to make my appearance. I stepped out from behind the cart I was hiding behind.

"Tsunade-hime, I've always wondered about this! How do you summon Lady Katsuyu when you're afraid of blood?" I tossed the keys in my hand, staring Tsunade-hime right in the face. She growled, pointing her finger at me and started to make her way over.

"You little-" I opened my mouth and dangled the keys over my face.

"Don't test me, Hime. I'm tired, broke, and my brother needs healing. I'll do it, I will eat these keys if it gets you to heal him."

"You wouldn't dare, kid. You're tiny, you'd choke on those."

"I'm prepared to make that sacrifice. But, this is not the only thing I have. Recognize these?" I shook one of the bottles in my other hand.

"You brat, you stole my sake! I knew I wasn't going crazy."

"Oh it belongs to you?"I chucked the bottle at a wall, sending glass flying, "Whoops it's ruined." I took a step back as Tsunade-hime stepped forward.

"Brat, give me the keys and sake back."

"I don't think so. Heal my brother."

"No." I chucked another bottle at her feet.

"Heal him!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"No!"

"Yes!" I laughed.

"Got ya! Now you have to heal him! I don't make the rules, and I'm not really sorry. Now come on!" I cast out my senses to find my boys, and grinned when I found them. I bolted towards their chakra, Tsunade-hime on my tail.

I burst into Tsunade-hime's hotel room and skidded to a stop in front of Shicchan.

Tsunade-hime came in and froze when she saw Shicchan.

"....Why is Shunshin no Shisui, who is supposed to be dead, in my hotel room?"

"I can explain."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another drawing, this time of Hisoka and Damien: https://nakamurasuzuki.tumblr.com/post/190520627999/im-not-too-proud-of-hisoka-but-damien-looks


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two drawings I did, one that I spent a full 12 hours doing, and the other a companion piece to the Madison/Suzuki drawing


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tsunade has a habit of adopting dark haired, dark eyed children.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you guys know, I went back and bumped Suzuki and Hisoka's ages up to 9 and 3/4 and 9 for something that I have planed in the future. It doesn't change much, just gives them more time with Chichi.

"So you're telling me … that the Sandaime ordered a massacre, and that Danzo has a secret ANBU army called ROOT. The Sandaime has been looking the other way while Danzo does his dirty work. Did I get that right?"

"Yes, ma'am." I looked between Shicchan and Tsunade-hime as they talked.

"Alright, then what's with the two brats?"

"We pulled Shicchan out of the river and revived him. Also, I have something to say." Tsunade-hime blinked at me before smirking.

"Spit it out then, brat."

"ROOT killed our parents when I was 5. Going by what Shicchan said, I have come to a conclusion. The Sandaime and Danzo are useless and we should totally kill them." All three adults stared at me.

"Alright kids, you two are going to go hang out in another room while the adults talk."Shicchan ushered us out of the room.

Unfortunately, the only other room in Tsunade-hime's hotel room was the bathroom so we had to sit in a cramped room. I hopped up on the counter while Hicchan sat on the toilet.

"So… what are we going to do? Why do you want to kill the Sandaime and Danzo?" Hicchan questioned. I sighed.

" _ He left a small child in an orphanage and then later in an apartment by himself. He did nothing to stop the village from treating the previous leaders kid like garbage. He let Oreo go because he's too soft. He ordered the massacre, and for all we know he could have looked the other way while Danzo ruined countless children's lives, including ours. Danzo is the reason Helmet and Sai are like That, and I'm willing to bet that he's most likely the reason that the White Fang, Tsunade-hime's brother and fiance, and Oreo all ended up not being able to take the hat. All were prime candidates for leadership and just so happened to die or be corrupted before they could have a chance."  _ I said in English. Hisoka followed my lead.

" _ Those are pretty good reasons, I didn't even think about it like that. Oh, is there any reason you're not saying anyone's name?" _

_ "We're not supposed to know about most of the people I mentioned, and names sound the same in English so it's best to refer to people with their translated names or something we recognize, Sai doesn't count because that's not his name yet. If we can free him, we can suggest that name later." _

_ "So what are we going to do about them? We're just kids, Tsunade-hime is terrified of blood, Shicchan doesn't have his Sharingan, and no offense to Shizune but I doubt she's strong enough to take on Danzo."  _ Hicchan looked at my face, and I could see the realization hit.

"... _You_ _already have a plan, don't you?"_ I shook my head.

" _ It's not a full plan, but some ideas that I really want to bring to life. We need to get stronger, obviously. I don't want to evolve my eyes any further just yet, so we should work on our skills until we can use them in battle effectively. If we just so happen to come across certain rouges, well who can blame us for taking any advantage we can get our hands on?" _

_ "You just want to see the cultist and the bounty hunter, don't you? Suchan, they are seriously dangerous and won't think twice about killing us, especially the bounty hunter."  _ I raised an eyebrow.

" _ I was thinking more along the lines of heading to Iwa and grabbing the suicide bomber when he defects, but I wouldn't pass up a chance to meet either of them. Maybe we can grab a map and make our way to Kiri, meet a certain swordsman? I know how much you admire him. Besides, I didn't even bring up possibly scoping out Oreo and maybe crashing the exams with him. That would be dangerous."  _ Hicchan didn't get a chance to answer because the door was practically slammed open. Our heads whipped to the door and stared at Tsunade-hime, who looked like she was going to say something and promptly forgot what it was.

"Why are you two sitting in the dark with your Sharingan on?" 

What. 

I looked at Hicchan and was met with glowing red eyes filled with surprise.

"How the shit did we not notice this."

"Language, Suchan!" I was very tempted to belt out the Cuss Word song out of spite, but decided against it to keep up my image of a mostly innocent little girl.

I pulled my chakra in and let my Sharingan blink out of existence before hopping off the counter and exiting the bathroom.

"Shisui managed to convince me to let you three tag along, but he didn't tell me anything about you two. What're your names?"

"Nakamura Suzuki at your service, Hime." I playfully bowed, which got a surprised chuckle out of the woman.

"I think I'm gonna like you kid. And you?" Tsunade-hime planted a hand on my head and roughed up my hair, turning to look at Hicchan.

"I'm Nakamura Hisoka, it's nice to meet you Tsunade-hime." Hicchan bowed, which, I mean, good for him for being polite and all but I was hoping he'd join me in being silly.

"Could you tell me your parents names? You don't have to if you don't want to, but it'd be helpful in keeping you safe if I know what I'm dealing with."Tsunade-hime kept her voice gentle.

"Mama was Uchiha Kameko, and Papa……. Papa was Senju Takahiro."


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chapter from the POV of a character whom you've never met before.
> 
> If you're reading this from anywhere other than Ao3, this fic has been stolen and you should report wherever you are seeing this because they are making a profit off of my work, which is supposed to be free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one took some time to write because I couldn't figure out how I wanted to introduce her, it was just too hard at first but then a thought came to me while I was in the shower and I had to get out as soon as possible to write it.
> 
> Also, seriously. Visit my tumblr because I post my pictures there first and also I just really want people to ask me questions about my gremlin children and this universe. Because it's definitely an au now, I'm kicking canon out of this house. It's homeless now.
> 
> Link here: https://nakamurasuzuki.tumblr.com

I think the first time I was truly aware of myself was the day I was first brought to the orphanage. I was confused, where was Mom and Dad? Who was this strange man who handed me over to this strange lady? Where were my siblings?

Nobody bothered to even tell me my name for the first week, they just called me 'little lady' until they realized I thought that  _ was _ my name. And when they finally did tell me my name, I thought 'That isn't right. My name isn't Chiasa, it's Aryonna! My name is Aryonna!'. 

It was a very confusing first few weeks. I didn't know where I was, if I was in the same time as my last life, or if I could ever find my original family again. All I had was my name, and I didn't even want that because  _ it wasn't  _ **_mine_ ** . 

After a few weeks, I finally accepted my new fate. At least, I tried to. I learned that my full name is Akimichi Chiasa, and that I'm in Iwa, a Japanese speaking country that is definitely not from my world and instead from a world I know about from my older sisters ramblings. I'm in Naruto, a world where children are forced to be child soldiers when all I wanted to be was a painter. 

I don't want to die again.

I don't want to kill.

.

.

.

For a time, I was in the Iwa Academy for Young Shinobi. I only joined because it was the only school I could join as an orphan. I was bullied relentlessly because of my red hair, the pink spirals on my cheeks, my weight, and the scars on my arms from people biting me for my energy. 

I only made one friend in my time at both the orphanage and in the academy, an artist like me. His name is Deidara, and he's 10. I vaguely remember him being important to the show, but I only remember my sister telling me that he likes explosions and that he runs away from his village. I don't think I'd be able to stay here if he left, so I know that I'd follow him wherever he goes.

We met at the Academy when he defended me. I still remember it as if it was yesterday. Daishiro and Atsuko had been bullying me again, but this time Daishiro had actually hit me. In this life I had never been hit outside of sparring, and it left me reeling. That's when Deidara showed up. He had threatened to blow them up if they didn't leave me alone, and he had helped me up after. That's when I learned that he was an orphan too, and that we both liked making art. We soon started hanging out more often, even if Kurotsuchi made fun of him for 'hanging out with a baby'.

It was during one of these hangouts that I caught a glimpse of green in the crowd. Green hair shaved on both sides and pulled into a ponytail to be exact. 

But that couldn't be right, could it?

Then I heard it.

"C'mon D, We're gonna be late! Tsunade-hime is waiting for us on the other side of the village!"

"Slow down, Madi!"

Madi.

_ Madi. _

**_Madi._ **

I broke into a sprint towards the two people who couldn't actually be here and-

" **_MADISON!_ ** "


	9. Chapter 9




	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some information, an outing, and a reunion.

I ended up stealing someone's bingo book so that we could use people's names without suspicion. Also so that I could fangirl over people's strength, but that's actually something that's changed from my past life. Before, it was a casual thing, maybe a comment about the size of someone's muscles, but now…..

"Look at her, she could crush my head and I wouldn't even be mad. Seriously." I shook Hicchan' shoulder and pointed at a portrait of Terumi Mei. Hicchan hummed and turned the page, pointing at a picture of Zabuza.

"Yeah, but look at his mission success count. I wouldn't be mad if he stabbed me." I nodded in agreement, turning until I came across Nii Yugito.

"She's a jinchuriki, and she has control over her power! I want to meet her!"

"I honestly would thank her if she killed me."

"That's something we both can agree on." I slapped Hicchan' hand with enough force to make both of us recoil in pain.

"Why are you talking about people's muscles and letting them hurt you? And whose bright idea was it to break your goddamn wrists with a high five?" Tsunade-hime tutted, placing glowing hands on both of our wrists.

"Wait, I actually broke our wrists? Holy shit."

"Language, Suchan."

"Fuck off." Hicchan stuck his tongue out at me, and Shicchan wandered over.

"What's this I hear about letting people kill you?" Shicchan tapped the cane Hicchan made him on the ground. It's only temporary because he's been getting better at not walking into trees but sometimes he gets tripped up.

"Oh,you don't do that? Papa said he thought it was genetic. He made a theory based on how we interacted with each other, and on Mama's past experiences with other Uchiha. It has something to do with our eyes, and trying to avoid trauma. We find ourselves attracted to strong people, be it for love, friendship or rivalry. Papa's biggest example of this was Madara-ojisan and Hashirama-ojisan, and what happened to Madara-ojisan after he lost Izuna-jiji. We lose ourselves in grief, and we try to avoid that by making the people closest to us harder to lose. I was actually really pissed off that Hicchan was physically weaker than me when we first started training, and actively made sure that he did enough to match me in strength." That was actually something Papa came up with, but he never told me. He thought I was asleep and was talking to Mama about his great theory.

Shicchan's jaw dropped.

"That…. That actually makes a lot of sense."

"Yeah, especially about the part where you decided to throw yourself off a cliff in front of our cousin." Came my dry reply.

"How did you know about that?"

"On our first night together, you started talking in your sleep. Based on where we found you, it wasn't hard to put together what happened. Also, he's in the Bingo book for the Uchiha Massacre already." I say already because it literally just happened four days ago. Word travels fast, Doesn't explain how they updated the books so quickly though.

Shicchan growled.

"He didn't do it! It was probably the bastard that stole my eye…"

"Mmhmm….. The only witness was his younger brother, who was tortured for 3 days in a genjutsu. Hey, Hicchan, if I ever try to do that, you are free to stab me as much as you want."

"Got it."

"Alright brats, let's keep moving. At our next stop, I'll teach you a jutsu." Hicchan and I both gasped in excitement and ran ahead, leaving Tsunade-hime to laugh at us.

The next time we stopped, we were at a hotel in Iwa.

"Because we don't want rumors of Uchiha children running around Iwa, I'm going to teach you how to use Henge. Watch closely." I immediately turned my Sharingan on and focused on her hands.

"Dog-boar-ram. Those are the hand signs, and here's what the jutsu looks like," She changed into a perfect copy of Shizune-chan,"Now you try."

I got it on my first try, transforming into my old self without any issue. Hicchan however forgot that he can use his Sharingan to copy ninjutsu and only got a poof of smoke and a change in eye color. I promptly fell on my ass and laughed at his dumbfounded face.

His second attempt was much more successful, changing into his old self. 

We were told that we could go explore the village as long as we kept up our Henge. We promptly took off, giggling like the children we are. It's been so long since I've been able to act completely myself, that the looks we get from our foreign appearance are worth it.

As soon as I set eyes on a book store, I was dragging Hisoka in and looking through their writing supplies. Hisoka decided that he'd rather look through the teen fiction (he never did outgrow his dislike for romance and horror, which seems to take over most of the adult section. Where's the adventure?) And rifled through the ones he'd deemed good enough to at least look at. I would have been right there beside him, but the writer in me  _ screams  _ and makes grabby hands at all the journals and writing utensils and I can't resist. 

I ended up buying three empty journals and a few pencils for myself, and The Tales of a Gutsy Shinobi for Hisoka. It only cost 1000 yen, which is a steal for a book from Erosenin, even if it's not his bestselling book. Obviously, Iwa doesn't want anything to do with anyone even remotely close to the Yondaime Hokage.

After, we went out for lunch. It was a cute little shop that we stopped in, and the owner was a young woman with plum colored hair.

"Here's our menu, just call me over once you've decided on what you're having." She had a nice smile.

After a few minutes of browsing the menu, we finally decided on two bowls of Gyūdon. We quickly ate our food before we had to leave because we only had 15 minutes til we had to meet back up with Tsunade-hime, Shizune-chan, and Shicchan.

I grabbed Hicchan' hand and started tugging him towards our meet up spot once we left.

"C'mon D, We're gonna be late! Tsunade-hime is waiting for us on the other side of the village!" I playfully jabbed at him

"Slow down, Madi!" Hicchan laughed.

I didn't make it very far after that, as I froze when-

" **_MADISON!"_ ** An unfamiliar voice screamed my original name, and a tiny body slammed into my torso and almost took me down. Teary green eyes stared up at me, lip quivering.

" _ I never thought I'd find you again, Madi." _ It clicked in my head.

I know that voice.

" _ Onna! I thought you were gone forever, Onna." _


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where cannon is once again thrown out the window and our party grows yet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is mentions of child abuse.  
> Warning: At the end there is very mild gore. Like, nothing too graphic (although my standards are probably a bit skewed compared to other people, so take that into account as well).

Aryonn- er, Chiasa now, was on that god forsaken trip with us when we died. After Mama and Papa died, I gave up hope of ever seeing my little sister again, and avoided thinking too much about her to avoid giving myself hope.

But now she's here, and she's safe and-

"Who the fuck gave you these?!" I growled as I grabbed her arm, staring at the bite marks marking her delicate skin.

'Uzumaki, that's the only explanation for these.' I gently rubbed a thumb over the marks and knelt down to her height. 

Oh god she’s so tiny-

“The people at the hospital brought me in to help with heal-”

“GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY SISTER YOU CREEP!” I was kicked in the ribs by a tiny child with  _ BlueEyesBlondeHairOhKamiHeLooksJustLikeMinato.  _

My eyes zeroed in on the way he held himself exactly like I did once upon a time, like trying to look like you’re fine even when you’re not. Bruises so suspiciously placed it couldn’t be anything except for purposeful, what looked like an improperly healed ankle fracture, all indicators of abuse. With how similar he looks to the Yondaime Hokage, I can't say I'm surprised but….

They're only kids, and they are so tiny and  _ fragile. They're babies. _

I can't say that I didn't want to kick Ōnoki in the face as hard as physically possible at that moment, but I know restraint. Somewhat. I won't kick him just yet.

"Kid, I can explain but it would be best if we get you two somewhere safe first." I offered a hand to both kids.

Chiasa did her best impression of a koala and clung to my front instead, burying her face in my neck. Deidara was much more cautious, but still gently took my hand.

I didn't grimace at the handmouth when it licked my palm, even though it felt disgusting, and it made Deidara gape at me with a mix of wonder and hope, which broke my damn heart and put a crack in my resolve to not take off with these two babies at once and spoil them rotten just like they should be.

I ended up leading them to the hotel, and ducking into an alley beside it. Once I was sure that we weren’t followed, I dropped my henge and introduced myself.

“My name is Nakamura Suzuki, and this is my little brother.” Hicchan smiled a bit.

“Hi, I’m Hisoka. It’s nice to meet you, and it’s great to finally meet my honorary little sister. Suchan’s been bragging about you ever since she met you!” Hicchan knelt to Chiasa’s height and offered his fist to her. She looked confused for a second before giggling and knocked her fist against his in a fistbump.

“It’s nice to meet my honorary big brother too, then!” he grinned and stood up. 

“I’m Deidara. What’s going on?” 

“Iwa isn’t a safe place for kids like Chiasa-chan, or even yourself. Only one clan has the ability to heal through being bitten, and it isn’t the Akimichi. It’s another clan that comes from a country Iwa helped destroy, Uzushio. Most Uzumaki are dead or in hiding, and the fact that Chiasa-chan wasn’t informed of her heritage just makes things worse. Nevermind the facts that you look remarkably similar to Konoha’s Yellow Flash, and that the Akimichi are also Konoha-born.” I stared into Deidara’s eyes, hoping he’d get what I was trying to say. It took a second, but understanding flooded his eyes, quickly followed by horror.

“What can we do?”

“Suchan is offering to take the both of you with us when we leave. We can’t take you with us right now, but tomorrow we’ll be off to Suna. I doubt it’ll take much convincing to get our companions to let you travel with us.”

“Yes, please! Take us with you.” Deidara didn’t hesitate, anything to get away from a village that doesn’t accept him or his adopted sister.

“Pack up anything that you need, but keep it small. Hide it somewhere near the edge of the village, or even just outside the village if you can, and you can grab it tomorrow when we leave. It’ll be at around 12, think you can meet us near the village border just before then?" I asked, and was pleased to see both of them rapidly nodding.

“We’ll see you then, now scram!” Chiasa giggled and ran off, dragging her blonde behind her. I sighed and reapplied my henge, grabbing Hicchan’s hand and dragging him behind me to go find Tsunade-hime and Shicchan.

“What took you brat’s so long?”

“I am going to fucking dropkick Ōnoki if he ever shows his face near me. I swear to kami, I am  _ this close _ to punting him into the moon right now.” I growled in a tone that definitely should not come from a human, never mind a ten year old girl.

“Suchan, what’s wrong? What happened?” that was Shizune. I feel guilty for actually ignoring her up till now, but i’ll apologize later when i don’t feel like i’m going to rip  someone’s head off.

"Tell me why I found an Akimichi-Uzumaki  _ toddler _ being used for her bloodline ability, and a boy who looks remarkably similar to the Yondaime Hokage bearing signs of abuse?"

Tsunade-hime chokes on the sake she had just taken a sip of.

"Excuse me- _ WHAT _ ?" She sputtered.

"Exactly my thoughts, so I've adopted them. They are mine now, and I'm bringing them with me no matter what. No one deserves to live like that." 

Nobody could argue with me on that, and so it was official. Deidara and Chiasa would be coming with us on our journey.

When I had finally gone to bed that night, I couldn't sleep. I was just too excited to finally be reunited with another one of my siblings.

In the morning, I was practically vibrating in my seat as I ate my breakfast, earning amused looks from everyone at the table.

When we finally left the hotel, I was on high alert, looking to find both of my new siblings. I eventually spotted them slipping out, past the guards without so much as a glance from the people who were supposed to be doing their job. 

I was very impatient, 'gogogogo!' on loop as my mantra while I waited for Tsunade-hime to get the all clear for us. I could see a glimpse of Chiasa' hair from where she peeked out from behind the huge outcropping of rocks just far enough to not be noticed if you weren't looking for it.

As soon as we were close enough, Chiasa was right by my side, nattering away about how excited she was to be going on an adventure with her new family, and Deidara was walking a bit in front of me, drinking in the environment like a man on the verge of dying of dehydration. 

An hour later, an unfamiliar chakra signature pinged in my senses, just off into the sparse forest beside us. I didn't pay any mind to it because it was such a small signature, but I should have.

Two senbon came flying out of the trees, and everything slowed down. One was heading right for Shizune, and the other straight for Deidara' jugular. I could see the slight purple sheen on both senbon, but I wouldn't be fast enough to stop both of them. 

I let go of Chiasa' hand and stepped in front of the senbon, staring straight at the assailant in the pine tree as the senbon sunk into my shoulder as my sharingan spun to life. I didn't think of the pain, the only thing on my mind was that this person tried to kill my brother with his blueblueblue _blue_ eyes and his blonde hair that reminds me so much of another little boy in another life that I'll _never see again, and I_ _can'tlosethisonetoonononono_.

The tree that the masked assailant sat in burst into life, bark splintering as root-like tendrils reached out and wrapped around their masked face and their arms and torso and  _ squeezed _ , dragging the lifeless, twisted, bloody body into its embrace, where it would become a source of energy for the now carnivorous tree.

That was the last thing I saw before everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not sorry for leaving it off like that. Not at all.
> 
> Anyways, I have a lot planned for the next few chapters, and a lot of it is going to be important as it's leading up to the timeskip to the actual cannon events. And Suzuki is going to screw everything up for everyone involved, except for her siblings.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A different pov.  
> Sorry it's so short. I was struggling with writing this man, and this is all my brain would let me write for him

Learning that Tsunade had disappeared was unexpected, but not completely surprising. She hated being chased down, and the fact that she wasn't quite emotionally stable after everything, it just made sense that this would eventually happen. 

However, learning that she had allegedly kidnapped a few kids in Iwa and made off towards Suna? That was absolutely ridiculous… but there had been rumors of some dark haired children other than Shizune following her around the continent, so….. not entirely out of the question. 

I had finally managed to find a village where there were sightings of Hime within the last 48 hours, and being this close I could sense her chakra in a small inn just a few building down from where I'm standing. 

It pained me to ignore the receptionist, a pretty woman with honey coloured eyes and light brown hair pulled into a low ponytail, but I am on a mission and I must stay professional.

I found the room that had Tsunade’s chakra radiating from behind the door, along with Shizune’s and five unfamiliar chakra signatures. One of them seemed familiar, maybe someone I had run into once before, and two of them seemed to be similar to both the familiar one and Tsunade. Had she hooked up with the other and had kids? I felt a pang of jealousy, but I squashed it.

As long as Tsunade-Hime is happy, I can be happy for her too.

The other two signatures were strange. One was definitely an Uzumaki, only Uzumakis could have chakra that chaotic. The other was probably a kid from Iwagakure, they tend to have a dry feeling to their chakra, but this one was strange….

I knocked on the door and waited.

The door opened, and a tiny little thing peeked out from behind a curtain of red-orange hair. The Uzumaki then. She peered up at me with big dark emerald eyes, her pink swirled cheeks puffed up in confusion. So part Akimichi. Surprising, but not so far out there.

“Suchan! There’s a weird man at the door!” The pipsqueak turned her head back into the room and yelled.

“Hey, I didn’t even say anything!” I complained. Why is it that children can never tell that they’re in the presence of The Great Jiraiya?

The pipsqueak stepped back, only for another brat to take her place. This one glared at me in suspicion, black eyes glinting coldly.

“Who the fuck are you?” I could hear someone yell for the brat to watch her mouth.

“Thank you for asking! I’m Mount Myouboku’s Frog Hermit-“ I didn’t even get to finish my introduction when the brat punched me right in the family jewels. I fell to my knees,groaning in pain.

“HIME! THERE’S A GIANT PERVERT OUT HERE FOR YOU!” 

Suddenly, Tsunade was in front of me, looking like she was seconds away from punting me into the moon.

"I'm not going back to Konoha, Jiraiya. Get lost."

She moved to slam the door in my face, but I shoved my hand in between to stop her, wincing at pain.

"Wait, Tsunade…… Can we talk?" I pleaded. She rolled her eyes and huffed, clearly annoyed. 

"Fine, come in but make it quick. Shizune, can you go bring me some Sake? I'm gonna need it for this conversation." She muttered that last part under her breath. I got up and walked into the room, only to stop and stare at the dead man sitting at the table with two kids in his lap, a single green eye twinkling up at me in amusement.

"Hi, Jiraiya-san."

The brat who had punched me glared at me.

"Go away, we're planning to overthrow the government."


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy birthday to my dear little brother, the inspiration for Hisoka, and to Nara Shikaku.

“Sensei just…. let Danzo do that? Kami…..” I watched Jiraiya down his cup of sake in one go before burying his face in his hands.

“That has to change. A kage can’t be so much of a pushover that he lets a tyrant do whatever he wants. Kōsuke, can you take this to Emiko? Perhaps she can be of help with gathering more information.” Jiraiya scribbled a note out on a scroll before handing it to the toad, and just like that, the toad poofed into smoke and disappeared.

I turned to Shicchan and gave him a pointed look.

“So. When are you going to teach us how to summon animals, Shicchan?” It was an innocent question, but I really did want to learn. We’d need all the help we can get to even survive coming across someone like Kisame or Sasori, let alone Hiruzen or Danzo, or even Orochimaru if my suspicions are wrong.

Shicchan gave me a look.

“What makes you think I know how to summon animals?” I scoffed.

“I saw you summon those crows, Shicchan. I know that you can at least teach us the hand signs, even if you can’t get us a contract.” Jiraiya snorted.

“Smart brats you’ve got. Where the hell did you find them ?”

“They’re both smartasses, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. And as for where I found them….”

“I found him in the river while we were taking a bath in it. Saved his life, too. The idiot has no self preservation.” I elbowed him in the side.

“Like you’re any better, Suchan. You charge headfirst towards cults and insult them for fun. You have no room to talk.” Hicchan snarked back at me from Shicchan’ opposite side. I stuck my tongue out at him.

Jiraiya laughed, obviously thinking it was a joke. Shicchan sighed and shifted me off of his lap.

“I can show you the signs, but I can’t summon anything anymore. I gave up my contract so that Itachi wouldn’t know that I’m alive, or if anyone gets a hold of the scroll. Promise me you won’t try the jutsu without a contract, though. It’s really dangerous to try reverse summoning yourself to a realm, especially because not all summons are friendly with humans.” Both Hicchan and I eagerly nodded, activating our Sharingan’ in unison after a quick scan for spies and copied his movements, being sure to forgo using chakra……

However, the universe just seems to  **_love_ ** to fuck with us and all three of us disappeared in a puff of smoke and reappeared in a dark forest, the canopy so thick that the sun struggled to reach the ground. The only light came from tiny bioluminescent mushrooms and patches of glowing moss scattered around the area. The little light was just enough to illuminate the huge ass raven sitting on a branch just above us, along with an equally giant Goliath Birdeater scuttling down the trunk next to us, and revealing the  _ fucking  _ **_gigantic_ ** fox sitting in front of us.

I almost screamed when the Birdeater brushed against my leg, but I kept my cool. It is  _ not  _ a good idea to let fear be known in a very possibly hostile environment because you have no idea how anything will react to your fear.

And then it spoke, which makes it-her relatively less terrifying. 

“Nakamura Suzuki, Nakamura Hisoka, Uchiha Shisui. You three have been summoned because of the mark placed on you by fate. Your case is a special one, one that has only happened two times in the past.” The spider spoke. I just blinked dumbly at her.

“Shisui, you were supposed to die and yet you managed to cheat death, and that has left a mark of fate on your soul.” The raven spoke, bowing his head to my cousin yet still managing to look very regal.

“Hisoka, you see things that others don’t, and although you are not quite there yet, under my tutelage you will flourish into a master of manipulating the world around you.” The fox crowed, levelling Hicchan with a haughty look.

“Suzuki,you’re a special case. You have earned the favour of an old, forgotten god by killing the false god whose worshippers bastardized his ceremonies and religion, which has earned you an in with the horned serpents, should you ever need them. And yet, you are marked. You saw the world around you and have seen what it holds in store, and decided to change fate to match your vision. I can teach you to use that knowledge and the connections to your benefit.” The spider had a harsh tone to her voice.

“We would like to offer you a three way summoning contract with the Ravens,Foxes, and Spiders. Each of you would have a main summon, but still be able to summon from the other two realms if needed. However, if one of you breaks the contract in any way,including death, all of you will lose the ability to summon from it as well. That said, it would be an honor to be your summons.” The fox proclaimed. All was silent for a moment before Shicchan bowed. I follow suit.

“And it would be an honor to be your summoners, Kitsune-san. May I ask for your names? You never introduced yourselves.” Shicchan was very polite, which is logical . No matter how silly our cousin usually would be, It would be a bad idea to be rude to such high ranking summons.

“My name is Arashi of the Inari forests.” The newly named Arashi bent their head down to our level.

“I am Yūki of the Blood Spine caverns, my people will do their best to help you in any way they can.” The spider gestured to herself. Finally, the Raven introduced himself.

“I am Noriaki of the Black Pine forest, and my people will stand by your side.” Noriaki crooned, his voice much softer than you would imagine for a raven.

“It would be an honor to have a contract with you, Arashi-san, Noriaki-san, Yūki-san.” Hicchan knelt in front of Arashi. Arashi put their muzzle on his head and huffed amusedly.

“There is no need for formalities, child. Soon, you will be our equal, for that is the only term of the contract.” Arashi moved their tail to reveal a scroll.

I picked it up and unrolled it. There were 6 names already written, all a faded red. Most of the names were unfamiliar, but one stuck out on the first set of three. 

**_‘Ōtsutsuki Hamura’_ **

Pushing that away to freak out about later, I bit my finger and quickly wrote my name down, covering my fingertips in blood and pressing them down firmly beside my name before handing it to Shicchan. He copied me before handing it to Hicchan. I watched as he caught sight of the same name that I did and have a minor freak out before shoving it aside and also signing his name.

“And it is done. We will send you back to your motel, do not hesitate to summon us whenever needed.”

And then we were back in our places, facing three Sannin, one of which was not there when we left.   


Fuck.


	14. Chapter 14

Let it be said that I am not a good strategist when thinking on the go. Let it also be said that I am an idiot on bad days. 

Today is apparently a bad day.

Orochimaru has always been one of my favourite villains despite how creepy he had acted in the anime towards who is now my baby cousin. But even that did not prepare me for the sheer danger that he exudes, alongside the amount of killing intent flooding the room.

Now, I’m not scared of death. Been there, done that. Wasn’t fun, but not really scary. Painful, but ultimately just that. What was really scary was the thought that I wouldn’t be there to protect my siblings.

So, killing intent wasn’t that effective, but the air was thick with intent which made it kind of hard for my anxious ass to breathe because I don’t like feeling like people are staring at me and that’s what intent feels like. 

So I moved. 

Have you ever seen a border collie herd sheep? They are really fast, but add a prey instinct and you have what I looked like in that moment. Being tiny and athletic has its perks, I guess.

I didn’t really have a plan besides ‘Check theory, distract, get out of sight.’ 

My thumb was still bleeding, so I ducked around a corner just as a kunai flew past my ear, formed the hand signs and slammed my hand down the ground pushing as much chakra as possible into the seal. Thousands of tiny spiders poured out of the smoke. In the other room, I could hear Hisoka scream the jutsus name, followed by the very distinct sound of a thundering bark.

“Distract him, and obscure our allies' movements if you can. You,” I point at a black widow that was slightly larger than the others,” I need you to tell me if there’s any weaknesses that we can exploit on that person.” I made sure to keep my voice low. As soon as the spiders moved, I jumped out of the way of a stray jutsu and closer to Tsunade-hime. 

The widow took a moment before she told me what she could see.

“There’s two seals on his body, control and silencing. There’s something else, more mentally traumatic, but I can’t see what it is while he’s moving, the threads are getting too tangled for me to see the meanings.”

That doesn’t bode well, but it does confirm my theory about Danzo fucking around in Orochimarus head.

**_Shit._ **

I ducked behind an overturned table, grasping at the hilt of my dagger like a lifeline, and tried to get someone, anyone’s attention. 

I finally caught Shisui’ eye. I pointed to my tongue and then Orochimaru, hoping that he would get what I was trying to say. It seems like he did, because he proceeded to pass my message to Jiraiya.

But… even if Jiraiya could come up with something to put Orochimaru down for the count, he’d still need time and a distraction. 

Nobody else would be fast enough to get in close without getting really really hurt. Which just leaves me.

I shook my head, took a deep breath, and vaulted over the table, heading straight for the man, and took a flying leap at his face, dagger poised to plunge into his shoulder.

Everything slowed down, and for a moment it seemed that the world was holding its breath in anticipation. I could see the spiderwebs spreading from Orochimaru, and I reached out and grasped them in my free hand.

The rush of information on Orochimaru was unexpected, but it seems the connection went both ways, for the man staggered back in shock.

I almost missed it, the one piece of information that was soaked in anguish and surrounded two people I didn’t expect to hear about until much later. It had flown by so quickly. But it was enough for me to give Jiraiya the time he needed.

As my dagger sunk into pale flesh, I bared my teeth and leaned in as close as I dared to those serpentine eyes.

“I know.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is Into a fantasy by Alexander Rybak.

“I honestly should have expected the sword through the gut, really. What was he supposed to do,  _ not stab me?  _ Hell, I would’ve stabbed me if I was him. Can’t get angry at a man for defending himself, can I?” Tsunade stared at me with disapproval.

“Yes, you can. And you really never should have joined in the fight, you’ve still got trace amounts of poison in your blood,  _ and  _ you had a herniated disc in your lower spine, a broken rib, tiny dents in your skull, and multiple fractures in your jaw and collarbones, all healed incorrectly. You should have been in severe pain, how were you even standing,  _ let alone walking _ ?” 

That….. makes no sense. All of those injuries, I got when I was still Madison. The herniated disc was from when I was eleven, I broke that rib when I impaled myself on tree branch when I was 8, I don’t even know when i managed to break my jaw-

Oh. Bear.

“.....When you’ve been in pain for a long time, it eventually becomes the new normal and you forget what not being in pain feels like.” I finally answered. The look Tsunade gave me went from disapproving to alarmed to pity, but she didn’t ask any more about the injuries, which I’m grateful for because I have no idea how I would be able to lie about most of my injuries.

Tsunade did a few more tests and another round of healing on my gut before she left me to rest. I have no idea how long I sat there in that room before the door inched open and Chiasa peered in.

“Are you gonna be okay, Suchan? Tsunade-hime said you were really hurt.” 

Goddamnit, not the doe eyes.

“Yeah, I will be. Your big sister is tough as nails, remember? A stab wound isn’t gonna keep me down for long.” I gave her my best shit eating grin and flexed, causing her to giggle. She ran towards the bed, her tiny feet  _ tip-tap-tapping  _ against the wooden floor, before she clambered up onto the bed and settled beside me.

“Can you sing for me? One of our songs, maybe?” She smiled up at me, and I think I melted a little on the inside.

I hummed, how about a song from one of her favourite movies as a kid?

“Okay, let’s see if I remember the lyrics to this one.” I teased and tapped her nose.

“I have a dream, you are there,High above the clouds somewhere.Rain is falling from the sky, But it never touches you, You're way up high,” I smiled as she gasped in happiness. “No more worries no more fears,You have made them disappear.

Sadness tried to steal the show, But now it feels like many years ago. And I, I will be with you every step.  _ Heyy,Heyy.  _ Tonight I found a friend in you And I'll keep you close  _ forever.”  _ I squeezed her close, making her laugh.

“Come fly with me,  _ ohh a oh, ohh a oh _ , into a fantasy,  _ ohh a oh, ohh a oh,  _ Where you can be whoever you want to be, come fly with me.” Using a small scale genjutsu that Shicchan taught me, I created tiny dragons that flitted around the room like dragonflies. It was worth it to see her eyes light up in wonder. She’d always believed in them as Aryonna, and now I could make her dream come true, even if it was only an illusion.

“We can fly all day long.Show me the world,sing me a song. Tell me what the future holds,You and me will paint it all in gold. And I, I will believe you every way.  _ Hey, Hey.  _ 'Cause I, I have a friend in you. We'll always stay together.” 

When I finished the song, she had fallen asleep, clutching my arm in a death grip.

I took a moment to admire her, and of how pretty the pink yukata she wore looked when combined with her gorgeous chestnut complexion. She’d look absolutely stunning in any colour (except for maybe Mike wazowski green, but I don’t think anyone except Mike himself could pull off that colour anyways), while I would have to stick to pastels and blacks with my pale ass skin. 

And I guess it makes sense, the Uzumaki were unlikely to have lily white skin when they lived on the islands, spending hours on end out in the sun. It makes me wonder what else Kishimoto got wrong…….

Apparently, I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didn’t notice Orochimaru coming into the room and sitting in the chair beside my bed. When I finally noticed him, he was examining the small dragon that had landed on his hand.

“You are an interesting child, Nakamura-chan. It’s extremely difficult to create illusions of things you’ve never seen in real life.” He said, and I shrugged.

“Chiasa is an artist with a huge imagination. I drew from some of her drawings.” Not exactly untrue, but she was much better at landscapes than people and animals, unlike me who can’t draw a flower or tree for shit, but give me a pencil and time, and I can draw almost any animal. Except birds. Birds are really hard.

He hummed. I dropped the genjutsu, letting the reptiles fade away.

We sat in awkward silence for a few minutes before he broke it with a question.

“How did you know?” He didn’t need to clarify for me to know what he meant.

“You and I are the same, in a way. We have the same weakness, we would do anything to keep our family safe, be it by creating a new species of carnivorous trees or by slapping a curse seal on them as a form of protection from those who would like to spirit them away. I’d rather be hated by my family and silenced than for them to be hurt at the hands of my enemies because I loved them, wouldn’t you?” I asked, quiet and gentle.

“Best to throw yourself into danger and hope they survive than to watch them get hurt because you did nothing, right?” He answered, an edge to his voice, and I winced.

“Fair enough, Orochimaru.” I said and we both fell into a slightly less tense silence. That I broke less than a minute later because I’m an impatient ass.

“Will you teach me? That fight showed me exactly how hilariously outmatched I would be against the Sandaime or Danzo, and I need to be stronger in order to protect my family against the likes of them.” 

“Why ask me? We were enemies yesterday.”

“Because as much as I love my cousins, they want to go slow with teaching us how to fight and protect ourselves. I’m shit at seals, so I guess I’m a disgrace to my great grandfather, so I can’t ask Ero-sennin, and aside from basic first aid, I can’t heal for shit. You have the skill set best suited to teaching me, aside from Shisui, but he is too busy pussyfooting around actually teaching us anything useful in a fight…. so, that leaves you.” I looked at him. He looked right back at me with a strange look in his eye.

“Very well, tell me why I should teach you.” He challenged.

“Besides the fact that you owe me for letting Jiraiya know about the seals that were on you? Or the simple fact that you would be teaching one of two Uchiha-Senju? You should teach me because I can help you get your family back using the knowledge that comes with having the spiders as summons.” It was quiet for a moment before he smirked and got up. He made to leave the room, but turned before he closed the door.

“Lessons begin once Tsunade clears you for training.” I sighed in relief and let my head smack against the wall behind me.  


The next day, we set out for Sunagakure, although I wasn’t allowed to walk and had to be carried by Jiraiya. On the plus side, I was tiny enough that I practically disappeared in his hair and accidentally freaked out passing civilians when my face poked out over his shoulder.

Getting into Sunagakure was much harder than getting into anywhere else we’ve been so far, because of the sannin all together. All three had to use a henge in order to get in without causing an uproar. 

I ended up sneaking off to explore once they finally turned their backs on me and left me alone, and ended up in a park. There was a small swing set, so I went over and sat on one of the swings and just stayed there, gently swinging. I have no idea how long I sat there before a familiar tiny child walked over to the sandbox(which is rather redundant in a village in the middle of the desert) and started to build a sandcastle without using his hands. 

The one thing I noticed about him was that Kishimoto definitely whitewashed everyone in Suna because Gaara is in no way as pasty as he was in the anime. And also that he looks malnourished. Skinny wrists, unusually small for his age, multiple other things in his appearance. Made me want to strangle Rasa.

I waited a few minutes before I wandered over to him, looking at his castle.

“Hey, that’s really cool! I wish I could make castles as sturdy as that, mine always fall apart. My name’s Suzuki, what’s yours?” I noticed the scar on his forehead. Too late for Yashamaru, but perhaps I could help him realize that he’s not alone.

He just stared at me which got kind of awkward so I turned and started making my own castle. As I told him, I was incredibly terrible at making sandcastles. The sand was just too dry to do anything with it. I decided to channel a tiny amount of chakra into my fingers and made a small stream of water to wet the sand. I was fairly surprised when his sand didn’t react to my use of chakra.

“How do you do that? Mother isn’t screaming for your blood.” I looked up at him.

“You know that that’s, like, really bad? Moms shouldn’t be telling you to hurt others. Mine told me I should only hurt someone if they hurt me first, cause then it’s self-defence.” He frowned but fell silent, a contemplative look on his face.

I managed to get a halfway decent sandcastle by the time he spoke again, this time quiet and almost shy.

“Can you help?” He pointed at his castle, which he had dug a moat around, and all it needed to be perfect was some water.

“Of course! Here, I’ll even teach you how to use the jutsu if you want!” I filled up his moat before showing him the hands needed, and described how he should move his chakra.

“I’m Gaara.” He finally introduced himself and I beamed at him.

He accidentally poured too much chakra into the jutsu and ended up blasting me in the face with a stream of water. We both sat there in shock for a moment, his sand swirling agitatedly behind him, as if he was waiting for me to get angry. I busted out laughing, letting out an ugly sounding giggle-snort. I dipped my fingers in the water and flicked it at him, figuring that he probably wouldn’t react well to having a jutsu used against him, even in a playful setting. He blinked at me in shock before a small smile formed on his face and he blasted me with the water again. Taking that as a sign, I filled my hands with water and threw it at him. Soon it had turned into a splash fest, the both of us giggling in glee.

Our water fight ended when someone attempted to assassinate him, while I was in the way. His sand came up in a whirl, swirling around him to protect against the kunai that grazed my cheek. I immediately stood up, putting my body in front of him and screamed at our attacker.

“WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! ATTACKING AN INNOCENT CHILD WHEN HE’S JUST PLAYING!?” and because they didn’t seem to care that I was also there, I pulled out my dagger and palmed a few explosive tags I had filched off of Jiraiya. I didn’t get a response, the jonin just attempted to get to Gaara again.

**“Oh no you don’t!”** I snarled and threw myself at them, slapping one of my tags onto their vest before using their face as a launching pad and sprung back towards my new friend. I watched with disinterest as the man screamed and tried to get his vest off before the tag could explode. He failed, and there was a loud explosion. His arm landed in front of me and I kicked it away in disgust. I turned to Gaara, who was trembling, either in fear or anger, I have no idea which. 

“Do you know who sent that man after you, Gaara-kun?” I asked, although I already knew the answer and I was ready to boil over with rage for this poor kid. He blinked up at me.

“My father.”

“And who’s your father?”

“The Kazekage.”

I whirled around, my Sharingan activating out of rage, and went over to the man's corpse, and delivered several kicks all while screaming profanities.

“ **Someone is going to die today.”**


	16. Chapter 16




	17. Chapter 17

I offered a hand to Gaara.

“Do you trust me, Gaara? I want to help you.” He barely hesitated before grasping my hand with his tiny one.

“I’m gonna have to pick you up, is that okay? If you don’t like it, you can let me know.” He nodded and I scooped him up, ignoring the twinging pain in my spine and gut, and took off towards the chakra signature that felt like mulch and new growths, silently raging all the while.

Once I found Hisoka, I stopped just long enough for him to see who I was holding before he nodded and followed me. Tsunade tried to get me to sit down, but I spun on her and growled.

“ **We are going to see the Kazekage and we are going to make him pay for what he has done, with or without you, Hime. Let me go.”** My Sharingan spun, no doubt glowing through the hair that blocked my face from sight. She let me go, and all three sannin followed me as I stormed the Kazekage’s office.

“ **RASA WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!”** I hollered as I kicked the door down and stomped over to the desk, slamming my free hand down on the table.

I felt Gaara flinch against my cheek and made an effort to reel in my anger, if only to avoid scaring him.

“ _ You have 30 seconds to give me  _ **_one_ ** _ good reason as to why we shouldn’t revoke your living privileges.”  _ I snarled lowly, making an effort to lock gazes with the startled man in front of me.

There was nothing he could do to escape, even if he tried attacking me, not with the people in the room being able to tear him a new asshole in .3 seconds.

“The seal was faulty, the child can’t control the Shukaku. It’s in the village’s greatest interests for me to have him killed.” Rasa explained calmly.I could feel Gaara stiffen so I hugged him tighter to my side.

“ _ The child  _ has a goddamn name, you lowly piece of shit. You are a  **_father_ ** , your kids should be your top priority, no matter your position. If his seal was faulty, why didn’t you seek out help from a seal master to fix the problem?! If a jinchuuriki’s seal is faulty, it’s your duty to make sure it gets fixed, but you were too full of yourself to even think of reaching out to Jiraiya-sama for help. God, if this is how you treat one kid, how do you treat your other kids?!” As I ranted, the desk came to life under my hand, lashing out erratically.

“I have siblings?.....” Gaara asked and everything fell silent. I stared at Rasa for a long and tense moment.

“Your parent privilege has been revoked. Your kids are mine now, and if you ever try to get them back without their permission, I will not be held responsible for the damage done to your village.” I plastered a sickly sweet smile on my face and watched as Rasa’s face morphed from calm to anger to fear and finally landed on acceptance.

It wouldn’t have mattered anyways, he was bound to the desk with thorny brambles, courtesy of Hicchan.

“Do you want to show me to your room, Gaara? I’m going to help you pack your things and then we’re going to go find your siblings and help them pack as well.” I looked down at him and gave him a small smile.

“Put me down, please.” He squirmed and I put him down. He grabbed my hand and led me out of the room and down a hallway, and up some stairs. 

His room was…. Empty compared to what I'd think his room would've been like. The room was big, and that just made it feel all the more lonely with the empty space. He only had his bed, unused, an old green rug, a table and chair,a wardrobe and a single cactus on the window sill.

“Okay hun, can you show me everything that you’d like to take with us? I’ll seal it away in these storage scrolls .” I watched him pick up the cactus and place it on the table. He looked up at me expectantly, and I furrowed my brows.

“That’s it? Okay, but I’m packing some more clothes, and then later i can get Ero-Sennin to fix your seal so that you can sleep properly. We’ll buy you some more stuff when we get the chance.” I walked over to his wardrobe and sifted through the clothes, before wrinkling my nose.

“There’s no variety, that’s just boring. Okay, no clothes. I don’t blame you. We’ll get you more clothes after we leave the village.” I turned back to the table and unrolled the scroll, putting the cactus in the middle and channeled some chakra, making the cactus disappear and causing two gasps from behind us. 

Gaara startled and his sand lashed out, but I stepped in front of Temari and Kankurō before he could accidentally hurt them. Luckily, I escaped with just a few minor abrasions on my arms.

His hands flew to his mouth and his eyes widened in horror when he saw that he’d hurt me, and I could see tears beginning to form, so I strode over and scooped him up into my arms.

_ “I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry _ .” He repeated into my neck, his words muffled.

“It’s okay hun, it’s okay. You didn’t hurt me that bad, see? I’m not even bleeding, it’s just a scrape.” I held my arm for him to see, and he just grabbed my wrist with his tiny fingers.

_ ‘Why is a seven year old the same size as a four year old?’ _

I turned to the kids in the doorway who were both staring at me in awe.

“You can use chakra around him?” Kankurō asked. I nodded and looked at the man who had led them here.

“Thank you for bringing them here, Baki.” He nodded and left, which was sad because he deserved to be able to say goodbye to Kankurō and Temari.

“Why are you taking us with you?” Temari crossed her arms. 

“Because your dad, although he’s the Kazekage, is a shitty person and an even shittier dad. Father’s aren’t supposed to separate their kids, or attempt to kill one for something he can’t control. From what I’ve seen, he hasn’t even made the time to hang out with any of his kids. You can come back later if you want to, I won’t force you to stay with us, but after hearing that Gaara had no idea about you, I couldn’t bear to take away the chance for him to know you.” Temari seemed to accept that, and Kankurō frowned.

“Father told us to stay away because he’s a monster, but…. he doesn’t look like one. He just looks like a scared kid.”

“Exactly, Gaara hasn’t hurt anybody unless he has thought he was in danger. You’d react badly to chakra being used around you too if it was only ever used in an attempt to hurt you. I explained what I was doing the entire time, so he had no reason to think I was going to hurt him.” I explained, while Gaara listened quietly.

“ _ Oooh _ …” both the kids nodded in understanding.

Once I got to their rooms, packing took a lot longer. Kankurō had so many puppet care tools and puppets in general, and he took at least 12 different outfits. Temari was a little different, seeing as most girls at this age are obsessed with looks. She brought some practice fans, 20 different outfits that took her awhile to decide on, and a bunch of hygiene products. Which, fair. Being out in the sun all day with only a few girls, the group is bound to stink by the end of the day. Also, periods. No one likes to be sitting in their own blood. Ew.

Once everything was all packed up, I led everyone back down to where the Sannin were glaring down Rasa. At some point, Chiasa, Deidara, and Shisui all made their way here. Once they saw me, Deidara and Chiasa bombarded me with questions.

“Who are they?” 

“Why are you carrying him?” 

“Why are you standing?” 

“Are they coming with us?”

I just blinked at them until they stopped talking over each other.

“These three are Gaara, Temari, and Kankurō. Guys, these are Chiasa and Deidara. Yes, they will be coming with us. Temari,Kankurō, say your goodbyes because we’re leaving after we get our stuff from the hotel.” 

It definitely says something about your parenting when your kids go looking for their teacher to say goodbye to instead of you.

Later, when we were settling down to camp and after Jiraiya managed to fix Gaara’s seal, we sat down to talk about our plans.

“We can’t keep dragging these kids all around the five nations, people are going to start to realize what’s going on, and rumours spread fast.” Tsunade stated.

“If we want to be able to take down Danzo and Root, we’re going to need a place to stay and be like a headquarters of sorts, where no one would suspect a revolution is being planned.” Shisui added.

“We’ll need the support of a Daimyo, or an army backing us. It doesn’t have to be big, given the people we already have, but Danzo has his fingers in every big village, it’d be hard to gain loyalty from anyone affiliated with those villages.” Jiraiya said, and Hisoka and I looked at each other.

“Maybe…. I think we have an idea. We could use a village’s resources, so it’d make sense to join one, but all of them are compromised so…..” I trailed off and Hisoka picked up where I left off.

“It’d make sense to make a new village, so it wouldn’t look suspicious for us to go around to the Daimyos asking for assistance, but it’d take time to build up a village from scratch so perhaps we could rebuild Uzushio. The buildings would need to be renovated, and we’d need to appoint an Uzukage, but if we could make it that far and go around recruiting missing nin, we’d have a village and an army in no time.”

“Plus it’d be a kick in the balls to Hiruzen, and that’s always a bonus. Anyways, I’d vote Orochimaru-Sensei as Uzukage. He should have been Hokage anyway. That’s another point against Hiruzen.” I added and Hisoka snickered.

“I second that notion.” Hisoka added, and the adults looked between themselves.

“Always wondered what you’d look like under the hat, Oro.” Jiraiya joked. 

“It’d be funny to see sensei’s face when he sees you in the hat and leading one of his biggest failures.” Tsunade laughed..

“I don’t have any choice, do I?” Orochimaru sighed

“Nope!” Shisui chirped.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time skip

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was looking through the bookmarks on this and lemme tell you, I just about cried when I saw that someone bookmarked it to 'best fic collection ever read'. So, thank you TsukkiX. I would die for you.
> 
> Stuff like that makes my day and makes me feel appreciated. A happy author means more frequent updates. 
> 
> So tell me how it made you feel, I love hearing that and knowing that I made someone emotional or got them thinking. I want to know what you thought of my writing so that I can better improve future chapters.

Watching Gaara, Temari, and Kankurō become genin and Deidara become a chunin had to be the proudest moment of my life.

However, not becoming chunin with Deidara did get under my skin, and put a stop in our plans to become chunin in Konoha together. We'd have to find another genin to join our team. 

I was just getting ready for a meeting with my team when Gaara ran past me while I was dabbing concealer over the birthmarks on my face that had steadily grown more vibrant in color since they had first become noticeable when I was 12, and yelled something incoherent before disappearing out the door, quickly followed by Kankurō screaming that they had to get to the meeting place or Jiraiya was going to kill them.

Temari made her way over to me and hugged me, pressing a kiss to my cheek, and followed her brothers. 

"Have a good day, Mum." She tossed over her shoulder before closing the door and I froze for a whole ass minute before I registered what she said.

"TEMARI I AM NOT YOUR MOTHER, WE ARE THE SAME AGE! TEMARI!" I yelled and could hear all three of them cackling halfway down the road.

When I made my way to the training ground Shicchan, Hicchan, and Deidara were already there, practicing the shunshin so that some day they would perhaps reach the same level of efficiency and speed as our cousin. 

"Suchan, you're late! That's so unlike you, what happened?" Deidara waved me over.

"Yeah, sorry. I was having an identity crisis. Temari called me mom and I didn't know how to handle that." I shrugged. Shicchan snorted.

"So they finally told you? All three have been calling you mom since around a month after we stole them from Suna." I froze.

“What?” I whispered. Shicchan laughed and patted me on the back.

“It was sort of obvious how much they looked up to you, you treat them better than anyone else in their lives. You're one of the most mature people i know when you need to be, you are protective of them, you practically raised Gaara and Chiasa, you've taught them many things, and were probably the most positive female influence since they lost their mother. Nothing will change about how they treat you.” he ruffled my hair.

“Anyways, i was informed that the Chunin exams are in two months. I will not be able to be your jonin sensei for this because people still believe me to be dead, and if i want to get my eye back, Danzo will need to be in the dark about my survival so he doesnt use it. It will be up to you two to find a team leader and 3rd member in order to be able to participate. After the exams, I will go back to being your team leader and we can continue our team meetings,” I shared a knowing look with Hicchan,”I assume you already know who you want, based on the looks on your faces. Just be safe, okay?” Hicchan smiled and I nodded before Hicchan grabbed me by the hand and dragged me back home.

“So, we agree that we’re gonna go and kidnap Zabuza and Haku, right? I know that you were also unhappy with how their story ended.” Hicchan said, and I snorted.

“Hicchan, I promised you we'd save them. I know how much you look up to Zabuza. If kidnapping them is the only way to make sure they both survive, I'll make it happen.” I pulled out our travel scrolls and handed two to Hicchan.

“Hide these, we’ll leave after dark when Orochimaru-sensei decides to let me go.”

“There’s no need for that, Suzuki-chan. I already know.” Came Orochimaru’s voice from the doorway. 

“Hi sensei…”I turned and gave him a sheepish smile. He sighed and shook his head.

“Just be safe. If you get killed, I'll bring you back just to kill you again.”

“Sensei, i am a 44 year old woman in a 15 year old body. I know how to take care of myself. But I will. No one is allowed to kill me except Hicchan.” He laughed.

“ **_How long has he known?!_ **” Hicchan shrieked.

“Since he stabbed me.”

“Since I stabbed her.”

Hicchan stared at us before shaking his head and putting the scrolls in his pockets.

“You have until Wednesday before I have to declare you missing, and until Saturday before I'll have to put out a reward for your return. Don’t tell me where you're going so that I can have plausible deniability.” I shared a look with my brother before we both tackled Orochimaru in a hug.

“Thank you sensei!” I laughed into his robes. 

“Yeah, thanks Orochimaru.” Hicchan was a bit more reserved with his thanks, before we both jumped out the window and took off towards the ocean.

Once we reached the shore, I bit my thumb, performed the proper hand signs and slammed my hand on the ground, pouring a decent amount of chakra into the seal and pulled at the foxes connection. 

Tatsumaki, a gorgeous cross fox with golden eyes and 3 tails and whose shoulders were level with the top of my head, appeared from the smoke. They took a second to adjust to the sudden light difference before turning to me.

“Suzuki-chan, to what do I owe the pleasure of being summoned on this day?” They rumbled.

“Tatsumaki, we need to get to the mainland quickly. Can you help us?” I asked, making eye contact.

“Do you think i would have let myself be summoned if i wasn't ready to help with whatever you needed? Get on.” They dipped low enough for both of us to climb onto their back. I wrapped my arms around their neck and buried my face in the soft, thick fur there. 

Hisoka buried his face in my shoulder and then we were flying, the wind whipping around us and stinging our skin.

If we had taken a boat, it would have taken us three hours. With Tatsumaki, what would have been three hours was reduced to an hour, the only downside being our hair becoming a huge mess, and our hair actually got knotted together in the wind.

Tatsumaki was generous and brought us further inland than we had initially asked for, and we actually ended up on the border between Tanigakure and Konohagakure. I patted the silver markings on their shoulder in thanks and dismissed them.

We were only a few days' travel from Wave country, and yet I could already feel the immense chakra that could only belong to an Uzumaki jinchuriki on the edge of my senses. Naruto wasn't anywhere close enough for them to be fighting Zabuza, so we should arrive by the time Kakashi is starting to train Naruto, Sakura and our little cousin on how to tree climb.

I really hope I won't be recognized as an Uchiha because of my hair's recent decision to make like Izuna and mimic a duck's ass though.


	19. Chapter 19

IM AM SO SORRY FOR HOW LONG IT'S BEEN SINCE I LAST UPDATED.

SUZUKI AND HISOKA DECIDED THAT THEY WANTED TO BE PIRATES AND I STARTED A NEW FIC SET IN THE FUTURE AND IN A DIFFERENT UNIVERSE.

I WOULD'VE POSTED IT EARLIER BUT THERE ARE SPOILERS FOR WAYFARER AND I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA IF YOU GUYS EVEN WANNA SEE THAT. 

PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT ON IF THAT'S SOMETHING YOU'D LIKE TO SEE, REGARDLESS OF THE POTENTIAL SPOILERS, BECAUSE I HAVE 5 CHAPTERS ALREADY AND IM SUFFERING


	20. Chapter 20

I Just posted a one shot that I made specifically for the ~ _Spoopy month_ ~! Go check it out if your okay with reading about dead children, with tons of implied major character death.

Also, for those of you not aware, I did make the story I mentioned in the last update. It updates a lot quicker than this story seeing as I actually write more than one chapter before posting a chapter, unlike with this one. If you're getting impatient waiting for Wayfarer to get an actual update and want to read more of Hisoka and Suzuki's shenanigans, that is your best bet until i can drag myself away from one piece long enough to write something with nothing to do with it. 

For those of you wondering what these stories are called, The Spooky season one is called **The Lost** , and the One Piece crossover is called **The Whirlpool Pirates**. You can find them in the same series as this one.

For those of you who have stuck around long enough to read all of this, CONGRATULATIONS! You just won a tiny snippet of the next chapter!

_ "You're on." _

_ Almost as soon as the words fell from his lips, I was off like a rocket, throwing kunai at him to slow him down, some of which landed and sunk deep into his flesh. The ones that he managed to catch, he flung back at me with equal force.  _

_ I hissed as one sunk into the small of my back and another managed to lodge itself in my ribs, but I kept up the pace. A little pain isn't that terrible, just inconvenient. _

_ I was about to reach the tree when some roots reached for my ankle and slammed me into the ground, knocking the air out of my lungs and breaking my nose on the rock I had smashed my face into when I landed.  _

_ Hicchan laughed, loud and full bodied, once he slapped his hand against the tree's trunk. _

_ I glared up at him, my hands covering my face in an attempt to stop my blood from getting everywhere. _

_ "You broke my nose, fucktard. Shitty little cheater." My voice came out muffled and nasally. He just laughed harder before getting a hold of himself and coming to help. _

As i said, tiny. but this is all i can give you without giving away half the damned chapter. Hopefully, I'll be able to get this story going again soon so keep your fingers crossed. 

Until next time!


	21. Chapter 21

Getting back on the road felt amazing. Staying in one place for too long got me feeling antsy. I could tell Hicchan felt the same, the tension melting off of his body the longer we kept moving.

Going over our travel plan was not something we did often, and we probably should have done that more often, seeing as we are now debating on going by road or through the trees, each with their own pros and cons.

"If we go by road, we risk being found before we get the chance to find them, but we also have a straight forward path with no chance of being lost." Hicchan argued.

"If we go through the trees, it'd be way faster, and we would have time to do other things on our way back. And if someone wants to get the reward for our return, it'd be easier to avoid them in the foliage.we could get lost, but I'm a sensor and Kurama is like a fucking beacon to me. Worst case scenario, we summon Katsuki and get her to drop us over the bridge." I reasoned. Hicchan sighed but relented.

I did a mini victory dance before smirking at him. 

"Last one to that tree over there has to cook dinner."

"You're on."

Almost as soon as the words fell from his lips, I was off like a rocket, throwing kunai at him to slow him down, some of which landed and sunk deep into his flesh. The ones that he managed to catch, he flung back at me with equal force. 

I hissed as one sunk into the small of my back and another managed to lodge itself in my ribs, but I kept up the pace. A little pain isn't that terrible, just inconvenient.

I was about to reach the tree when some roots reached for my ankle and slammed me into the ground, knocking the air out of my lungs and breaking my nose on the rock I had smashed my face into when I landed. 

Hicchan laughed, loud and full bodied, once he slapped his hand against the tree's trunk.

I glared up at him, my hands covering my face in an attempt to stop my blood from getting everywhere.

"You broke my nose, fucktard. Shitty little cheater." My voice came out muffled and nasally. He just laughed harder before getting a hold of himself and coming to help.

His hands glowed green as they hovered over my nose, his cool chakra soothing the minor pain. 

It's always uncomfortable feeling bones shift under your skin as they straighten out and become whole again.

He didn't even hesitate to rip the kunai out of my back, not flinching when it caused blood to cascade down my back and pool on the forest floor. He was quick to fix the wounds before they could get anymore worse.

I stared at my ruined shawl and sighed, taking it off and sealing it for mending later.

I stood up and tested my back by stretching a bit until I was satisfied with the healing job. 

"Aight, I'll make dinner when it's time. Let's keep going."

In the end, we decided to make our camp in the forest and much closer to the small village than we had decided on earlier. Honestly, we could have just gone straight to the village if we really wanted to. Normally, the journey would be two-three days but one doesn’t have Uchiha Shisui as a sensei and  _ not  _ know how to use Shunshin to its full potential.

I ended up catching a squirrel, some robins and a hare. I let the squirrel go because who has time for possibly getting rabies? Not me. 

I snapped the necks of the birds and hare quickly before defeathering and skinning them, gutting them, and impaling them on sticks to roast them over the fire Hicchan built. Sadly, the only spice that we had was camp spice. 

Dirt and moss.

And bugs.

We learned a long time ago that it was imperative to not waste any food or drink while on the move unless it wasn’t even remotely edible anymore, so we learned to live with eating a little bit of dirt every now and then.

We ate in silence before we fell into our old routine of setting up bedrolls, perimeters, and traps, and getting ready for the first watch. 

It really says something about how well we understand each other that we can do that all without saying a single thing.

I took first watch, climbing up a tree and perching there. In the 4 hours that I spent in that tree, there wasn’t anything interesting and I actually was tempted to just…. fall out of the tree, to see what Hicchan would do. Obviously I did not, but the temptation was there anyways.

When it was Hicchan’s turn, I woke him up by kicking him off of his bedroll and stealing it for myself. He glared at me and I stuck my tongue out at him. No way in hell am I getting in the bedroll that’s bound to be freezing when there is a perfectly warm one right here.

That night, my dreams were filled with the pounding of drums and indistinguishable voices chanting in an unknown language and the faint smell of rotting flesh. When I woke up, it was with the feeling of fear and being watched settled deep in my gut. Whatever had set its sights on me, it was not something that I wanted to piss off. It was something….Other. It definitely wasn’t human, that’s for sure.

“Hicchan, I had a really weird dream last night. There were drums and people chanting-“

“And the smell of rotting flesh? I had that same dream.” We stared at each other as we thought of the implications of that.

“Suzuki, please don’t tell me you somehow got _ ninja Cthulhu _ on our tail.” Hisoka hissed at me. The feeling of being watched intensified and a loud rumble came from the forest, followed by the sound of a  _ very angry boar.  _ The colour from our faces drained and we grabbed everything we could before booking it out of the forest.

“HISOKA PLEASE DO NOT CALL THE OMNIPOTENT GOD ‘NINJA CTHULHU’! IT DOES  _ NOT  _ APPRECIATE BEING CALLED NAMES.” I screamed as we both ran.

“DULY NOTED!” He yelled back as we burst out of the underbrush and out onto the road.

There were four very surprised faces and one unconscious person in front of us. I took the chance to look behind us only to see a  _ FUCKING HUMONGOUS BOAR FOUR TIMES THE SIZE OF MYSELF. _

“FUCKING RUN!” I screamed at the children, scooping up the unconscious Kakashi and grabbing Sakura's hand as I ran past them, Hisoka throwing Naruto and Sasuke over his shoulder and running as fast as possible towards the village. Tazuna was left to keep up with us because I was honestly more concerned about the kids safety.

As soon as we were closer to the village, we dropped the kids and pushed them behind us, along with Tazuna and Kakashi. 

Hicchan tossed a shaky smile over his shoulder at the trio and Tazuna.

_ Boar Ram Snake Horse Dragon.  _

Chakra surged through my body, rippling through to my hands. All the hair on my body stood on end and the air smelt like it was burning. As soon as the boar was close enough to us, I held my hands out and slammed them onto its snout, letting the current course from my body and into the beast. Immediately after I stepped away, a trumpet of water blasted the thing even as electricity still coursed through it. 

I could smell the burnt hair, and the twitching muscles told me it was either dead or thoroughly knocked out. 

“Holy shit that was fucking close. I can’t believe that actually happened.” I laughed in disbelief as my legs gave out beneath me.

“That was entirely your fault.”

“You’re the one who insulted the thing that was watching us.”

“You’re the one who drew its attention in the first place.” I snarled at Hicchan and snapped my teeth at his hand when he offered to help me to my feet.

“Why is there another Sasuke.” Naruto stage whispered.   


“Who the fuck is Sasuke?”


	22. Chapter 22

We were planning on leaving the group once they were safely tucked away in Tazuna's home, however that soon changed when we found out that nobody knew anything about first aid except for like…. Extremely basic stuff like cleaning a wound and putting a bandage on a cut.

It's a fucking miracle that Kakashi actually woke within three days with how little Tsunami actually knows about first aid and medicine.

"How the shit are you alive?! This little shit in your head is a fucking black hole for chakra, what the fuck is up with Konoha and not fuckin doing their jobs?!" I snarled to myself as I watched Hicchan work his magic on the unconscious…. albino?Is that the right term for him? Partial albinism? I don't know, but silverette just doesn't feel right. And I don't think it's a word. 

I sighed, taking the pin out of my hair and undoing my ponytail. I ran my fingers through my hair. It left my hair a mess, but it honestly felt good and it helped me take out some of my frustrations in a safe way. 

"God damn it, these kids are practically sitting ducks right now. Who the hell decided to give this man children to look after?? Who thought that was a good idea, this man is just going screw these kids up, along with himself. He's like three mental disorders in a trenchcoat." Hicchan muttered and I couldn't help myself. I snorted hard enough that I could hear everyone in the house freak out. 

"You got that right. The sandaime really fucked up here, but then again, when doesn't he? He's senile, should have passed the hat on to Shikaku ages ago. At least the Nara knows how to not fuck things up." I scoffed and stood up, stretching my arms behind my back and cracking my shoulders.

I waved as I walked out of the room, walking down to the main room. Sakura, Naruto, and Sasuke were all just sitting around doing nothing. I raised an eyebrow as I leaned against the wall. 

"Shouldn't you be training? If anyone tried anything while your sensei is unconscious, you'd be worth squat if you're not alert and ready for an attack." I said, and all three jolted. Sakura fell over. I shook my head, laughing.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at my forehead protector, now on full display because my hair wasn't blocking it anymore.

"I've never seen that symbol before. What village are you from?" He asked, and I snorted.

"Should have asked that before you let us stay with you, what if we had been from Kumo? No, we're from a newly rebuilt village, Uzushio. Surprised you didn't recognize it, seeing as all Konoha in chunin and above have our village symbol on the back of their flak vests. And your teammate has it on his jumpsuit. Did the academy not teach you about us?" I asked. 

Sakura furrowed her brows as she thought, while Naruto stared at his arm in confusion.

"All we were taught was that Uzushio was a sister village and that they were destroyed during the third great Shinobi war." Sakura said, and I shook my head.

"Bet they didn't say that we sent for help and help never came. The uzumaki were a clan of fuinjutsu masters, and they were wiped out because of it. Guess Konoha didn't see it fit to save the family of the Shodaime Hokage's wife." I wandered over and sat on the floor, leaning against the couch.

"Uzumaki?" Naruto looked at me with wide eyes. I narrowed my eyes at him, pretending to examine his features. I slammed my fist into my hand and pointed at him.

"You look exactly like Kushina-hime! The coloring is wrong, but your face looks like her just a bit less round. Though…. Huh. Sensei did say that she married Namikaze-san. Huh. Well that explains the coloring." I shrugged and Naruto stood up, pointing at me.

"YOU KNOW MY PARENTS?!" He yelled, and I actually jumped from the volume.

"Uhhhhhm…. I'm pretty sure everyone knows them. They were war heroes after all. And Namikaze-san has his face carved into the Hokage mountain. How did no one notice this? Especially Hatake. He was practically adopted by Kushina-hime." I said, and everyone's jaw dropped. 

I glared at Sakura, because something about her was bothering me.

"Do you have any family in Suna? You look really familiar." Sakura jumped when I said that.

"Um yeah, Uncle Yashamaru and Auntie Karura." My eyes widened as I stared at her.

"Holy shit your Uncle in law is the Yondaime Kazekage. Sorry to be the one to tell you this, but he's a piece of shit and got both of them killed because he's a selfish shitbucket. On the bright side, you now have family in Uzushio." I practically dumped that revelation on her, and it honestly made a lot of sense. 

Because while in the anime they looked nothing alike, in reality Temari and Sakura look remarkably similar, from eye color to facial structure to actual skin color. The only difference was their hair. And Gaara also looks very similar. Sadly, Kankuro got the short straw in genetics and looks like a younger Rasa.

Sakura gasped in shock, and suddenly both her and Naruto were by my side, asking questions of all kinds about their families and hanging on to my every word.

"What was mom like?" Naruto looked especially eager to learn about her, and I get it. I'd want to learn more about my mom than my dad if I knew he was the one to strap a heavy burden to me when I was a baby.

"Well, I never knew her personally, but my senseis did. She wasn't called the Red Hot-blooded Habanero for no reason, you know. She was also the second Jinchuriki of the Kyuubi, an esteemed position amongst the Uzumaki Clan." I said, and Naruto grimaced. 

" It wasn't a bad thing, the uzumaki praised the Biju as gods, and technically, if the legends are true, they are. They are said to be the children of the Sage of Six Paths. Humans were just jerks and feared what they didn't understand, so they locked them into humans to keep them under control. They are sentient though, and being locked up for years on end would make anyone angry. They were supposed to be our protectors and we ruined it." I explained, hoping that it would kickstart Naruto and Kurama's relationship. 

"If they're sentient, does that mean they also have names?" Sakura asked, and I ruffled her hair.

"Smart girl! Yes, they do. The only one that I know for sure is the Ichibi, and that's because Gaara had a faulty seal that we had to fix. It was driving both of them insane, and when the Ichibi did get through every once and awhile, he screamed his name. It's Shukaku. I believe the Nibi is Matatabi, and the Sanbi is Isobu, but I can't really be sure, as all I've heard is hand me down legends. It's quite difficult for the others, but the Yonbi should be Son Goku, Gobi should be Kokuō, Rokubi is Saiken, nanabi should be Chomei, and I believe Killer Bee has been seen referring to his partner, the Hachibi, as Gyuuki." I lied about not knowing for sure. I definitely knew all their names. But it'd be suspicious for me to be so sure of myself.

"What about the Kyuubi? He has a name too, right?" Naruto asked.

I looked at him, staring him right in the eye. "It would be impolite of me to introduce him when he is perfectly capable of answering that question himself. If he really wants to, he will tell you himself Naruto."

Naruto lost all the color in his face.

"How-"

"How did I know? Your mother was Kushina-hime. Only an Uzumaki has the chakra capacity to hold the Kyuubi. The only other person to hold the Kyuubi was the wife of Hashirama, Uzumaki Mito. And the only Uzumaki who would have been there when Kushina-hime died would have been the son that she had just given birth to. Also, you are literally a beacon to anyone who is a sensor. There is no way you aren't the Jinchuriki." Sasuke looked at Naruto with interest.

"What're my cousins like?" Sakura, like the smart girl she is, changed the subject. I smiled.

"Gaara is absolutely the sweetest kid I have ever met. He's right around your age, and he is excellent at making sandcastles. And anything sand related. It's kind of cute. He also is a little brat, but that's to be expected, he didn't get the chance to be a kid when he was younger.

Kankuro is following in Akasuna no Sasori's footsteps and has become a puppeteer. Also a brat, but not as bad, he's a year older than you guys. 

Temari is an absolute pleasure to be around. She's independent, and doesn't take shit from anybody. And she packs a mean punch. She's a little older than me." I said, and She looked amazed.

"And all three of them call you Mom." Hicchan said, laughing at the face Sakura made.

"When did you finish up?" I asked. He shrugged.

"I've been done for a few minutes. You really like info dumping don't you? Anyways, wanna head out back for a spar? I'm feeling stiff from hunching over the entire time, and I think a good spar will do me some good." He tilted his head towards the forest out back.

I got up and followed him outside. The kids followed us curiously, and I smirked. They're cute.

We settled outside in the same clearing where Kakashi would teach the brats on tree walking.

I hummed as I redid my hair and I unclasped the dagger hanging around my neck. I flipped the dagger a few times as Hicchan fell into a familiar stance, more animalistic to reflect our fighting style. He had a simple kunai clutched in his left hand.

"Rules?"

"Taijutsu only, Chakra enhancing is allowed, and use the environment to your advantage. Anything else?"

"Yeah, if you cheat and summon Rue again, I'm castrating you without anesthetic." Hicchan paled at that, and I grinned.

"Letsjustaddnomaimingtothelistokay." He squeaked and I just rolled my eyes.

There wasn’t anything that signalled the start of the spar, there was just the minute twitch of muscles and we were flying at each other. 

Do you know what it’s like to know someone so well and have them know you just the same way? To always come to a standstill because every move you make was already anticipated, and every move they make against you is rendered useless at the same time? To know what moves your opponent would make instinctively? Because that’s what sparring with Hicchan was like. Don’t even need the sharingan to predict what would happen next because to me, it was if every move he made was being broadcasted straight into my brain. 

We moved like water, or perhaps it would be better to say we moved like the ocean. Strong, violent and fluid. There was nothing calm about us, so the ocean is a better descriptor. 

We jumped apart to breathe, and I made sure that I would land on a tree, just to kickstart the learning process and hopefully get Kakashi to be a better teacher. Because if two foreign genin are better teachers than a very much capable jonin, you should probably take a look at yourself and ask what you’re doing.

“Woah! How did you do that?” Naruto yelled, and I pretended to reel back in confusion.

“You mean no one taught you how to tree walk?!The academy should have taught you how before you graduated!” I exclaimed, and all three kids looked equal parts confused and indignant.

As they should be, this is literally something that they need to know before they’re released into the world. Konoha fucking sucks ass. 

We stopped our spar and I hopped off of the tree to stand in front of the trio.

“What did they teach you about chakra?”

“What’s catra?” Naruto asked and I just sighed.

“God Konoha has failed you if you don’t even know that. I was right, the Sandaime is useless Hicchan.” I said, and Naruto went red.

“The Hokage isn’t useless!”

“The position isn’t, the person in the seat is. It is his job to make sure that everyone gets a good education, to take care of wards of the state, make sure that all his shinobi get therapy and to get the village running smoothly. And just looking at your team, I can tell none of that has happened, because you two,” I pointed at both Sasuke and Naruto, “should have been living with the Sandaime if the orphanage wouldn’t take you. Kakashi should have been removed from active duty and had a Yamanaka thrown at him. You should have known exactly what you were getting into and taught the appropriate clothing to wear because you are all unprotected and beacons to anybody with eyes. White, red and orange are not good colours for a ninja unless you have the strength to be confident that no one will be able to kill you. You do not, you are fresh genin without the proper training, and the Sandaime is useless.” I concluded and watched the kids come to realize just how fucked up Konoha was. 

To not teach the future generations properly is to forsake your own future.

“Anyways, that is much too heavy for me to be the one explaining this to you, so let’s get back to talking about chakra. It’s a combination of the physical and spiritual energies. Having the right amount of each will allow you to use jutsu. Are you following?” I asked, and Sakura and Sasuke understood. Naruto looked really constipated.

“Nnnope.” He said after a few seconds, and Sakura punched him in the head. I grabbed her hand before she could do any more damage.

“Naruto, did you have anyone teach you hands on? Or did they ignore your questions?” I crouched in front of him as I asked.

“Uh, Mizuki-sensei helped me sometimes, but all the other teachers just yelled at me to pay attention. But I couldn’t, I tried really hard but I couldn’t.” And I could feel the horror coming off of Sakura because…. 

“No one’s been trying to find a way to teach that you understood. You haven’t been able to do well in class because no one’s being teaching you at all.” She said, and that definitely got Sasuke’s attention.

“They’ve been sabotaging you, just because you’re the container for Kyuubi-san. I’ll try my best to explain it in a way that you understand. What’s your favourite food?” I asked. Naruto’s eyes lit up.

“Ramen!” I laughed.

“Okay, we’ll think of it like this. You need to have the right balance of water and noodles to get good ramen. In instant ramen, all the noodles and flavour powder and vegetables are physical chakra, and the water is spiritual chakra. If you get the right amount, you get delicious ramen, or in this case, perfect jutsu. Does that make more sense to you?”

“Yeah!” Naruto pumped his fist in the air.

And that’s how Hicchan and I spent the next 2 and a half days, teaching the kids the basics that they should’ve known in the first place, taking care of Kakashi, being a storyteller. It was a welcome change.

And then Kakashi woke up.


End file.
